Starting from scratch
by Mariposa68
Summary: Auggie has left the CIA to tour the world with Tash. Annie is benched because of her heart condition and tries to adapt to her new job as a handler and to a life without her friend and rock Auggie.
1. Chapter 1

Annie walked across the parking lot to the supermarket. It was cold, cloudy and it had been raining the whole week long. Lost in thought, she stepped right into a puddle and within seconds her feet got wet up to her ankles. „Shit" she cursed. She had been distracted and had not seen the huge puddle. And then looking up, she saw a blind man with a cane coming out of the supermarket. Immediately she thought of Auggie. How does it feel for him to walk with a cane and to encounter obstacles all the time, to walk into puddles or to talk to people he couldn´t see. Auggie had never talked about „his world". She would have liked to ask him all of that but now he was gone. He had left with Natasha the Russian hacker girl to tour around the world and had left her behind. Annie had reached the door of the supermarket, got herself a shopping cart and strolled through the aisles and along the shelves to get what she needed to fill her fridge again.

Back again! Annie thought when she entered the CIA building in Langley and walked through the maze of corridors. But this time was different. She had gone through so much within the last two years and Auggie had always been there to help her. She could not imagine to work at the CIA without her best friend, her handler and her rock to rely on in rough times. On her way to Joan, she walked past Auggie´s office. She had expected it to be empty but Barber had made himself at home at his former boss´ desk and as an evidence of his presence the desk was already packed with empty coke cans, chewing gum paper, chips crumbs and pizza boxes. „Hey Eric" Annie greeted, peeking around the corner. „Hi Annie, good to have you back" Barber replied and then he added „Feels strange to be in this office now, I never thought I would be the one to occupy it". All of a sudden Annie felt a lump in her throat and she said „Well, it feels strange to come back knowing Auggie won´t be around anymore. I have to get going, Joan is waiting for me already" And with these words she left.

„Come in" Annie heard the voice of Joan and opened the door. Her boss sat at her desk typing on the keyboard and looked up when Annie came closer. „Take a seat" Joan offered and Annie sat across from Joan waiting for what was to come. „It is good to have you back Annie. I am amazed how well you have been dealing with all the things that have happened to you in the last two years but of course I cannot ignore your heart condition." Annie listened carefully and all of a sudden she was scared. Was Joan about to tell her that she should leave because of her health issues?" Then Joan continued „I have decided to let you come back to Langley but this time not as an operative but as a handler. You will handle a new operative as long as your health issues are not resolved. As much as I would love to give you my permission to go to the field, I cannot do that. For many reasons but first of all for your own safety. I am responsible for you."

Annie swallowed. What she had just heard was tough. She was benched! But she had expected something like that. She loved her unsteady and exciting life as an operative but would she be able to act as a handler, would she be able to protect her colleagues from harm when they relied on her during a mission? Again she thought of Auggie. How had he felt when he came back to Langley after his injury , well knowing that he could not go to the field anymore due to his vision loss? Of course, she was not blind but the effect of her health issues on her life as an agent, was the same. She was now supposed to remain at her desk while the others went to the field. „Of course I understand" Annie said when Joan had finished her explanation". And with that, she left Joan´s office to get back to her desk.

Annie sat at her desk, searching the internet for some information when a young man approached. „Annie Walker? Hi, I´m David, Joan has told me you are my new handler. I hope we will be a good team." Annie looked up. David was blond, he had broad shoulders, he was slim and had a radiant smile. He is just a kid Annie thought when she saw him. „Yes, I am Annie Walker she answered and offered her hand for David do shake it."

Thousands of miles away at the same time:

Natasha curled up at Auggie´s side. The weather was fantastic. It was hot and sunny, the sky was blue and the water was warm, too. Auggie and Natasha enjoyed their days on a beach in Hawaii. Natasha wanted to go to the Bahamas but Auggie had insisted on going to Hawaii, a place he had always wanted to go to when he was still sighted. But one mission after the other occured and finally the accident happened. He had never managed to get to Hawaii up till now. Of course he could not see the surroundings but he liked the idea of being in Hawaii whilst Natasha described to him what she saw. „Hey handsome are you up for a swim?" She teased and nudged Auggie. „Of course I am" Auggie replied and felt for Tash´s hand. She pulled him up from the lounger and they both made their way to the water. Auggie could not see what was around him, but feeling the sun on his face and swimming in the warm water made the difference for him. Made him feel that he was in a different place, on a private vacation far away from Langley.

Twenty minutes later Auggie and Tash were sitting on a stool at the beach bar. Auggie sipped on a cold beer and Natasha on a Planter´s Punch. „I could stay here forever with you, Tash whispered into Auggie´s ear" and he felt for her, turned her face around and kissed her. „I really enjoy being with you, too" Auggie confessed. Auggie had not used his cane a single time since he had arrived with Natasha a week ago. She guided him everywhere and he enjoyed holding her hand or touching her elbow when she led him around. Tash loved Auggie but from time to time she was a bit frustrated, too. Especially when she noticed the looks of pity when other people noticed that her friend was blind. She was prepared to be with Auggie, but she was not prepared for a world that seemed to believe that a person with a visual disability was less valuable, less capable. Natasha felt uncomfortable when she noticed how people watched Auggie with curiosity and pity.

It was dinner time and Auggie had just emerged from the bathroom. With his right hand slightly extended he made his way to the bed and felt for his clothes. He slowly dressed himself in a pair of dark blue jeans and a white shirt when Natasha asked all of a sudden „How did you get used to it?" Auggie closed the zipper of his trousers and attached the leather belt before he turned around and said „Used to what?" Natasha now felt a bit uncomfortable and replied with a bit of hesitation in her voice „Well...to... being watched by everyone?" „People are watching me?" Auggie quipped. But then his expression got more serious and he said „I know what you are talking about. When people notice that I am blind they often stare, wondering how I can get around as a blind person. I don´t like the idea of being watched but there is nothing I can do about it. So I try to ignore it and that is what you should do, too".

Dinner was delicious they had smoked salmon with baked potatoes, fresh salad and for the dessert ice cream with fresh fruit and cream on top. As always, Tash had guided him to the table and had put his hand on the back of the chair. Then, Auggie had carefully explored the table by feeling for the napkin and the cutlery and the win glass in front of him. He was not a bit clumsy and Natasha was always surprised how well he handled all kinds of situations whilst being blind.

In Langley:

„David, come back immediately" Annie shouted into her headset. She was furious. The rookie agent she was handling, had not listened to her advice and now acted all on his own. And while a wave of anger was about to wash over her, she remembered how she had started about six years ago. She had been more than stubborn and more than once she had ignored the orders of Joan and the good advice of her friend Auggie. Now she was on the other side and got an idea what it was like to be a handler. Being a handler was a completely new life and she felt like she was starting to learn her job all over again.


	2. Chapter 2

Starting from scratch part 2

Auggie and Tash spent 4 weeks on Hawaii and enjoyed to let go of stress, missions and all the spy stuff that had caused them so much pain in the last months. After the time in Hawaii Tash insisted on going to Moscow. She wanted to show Auggie her home country. Auggie had been to Russia a couple of times during missions but never long enough to really discover the country and he had never been to Moscow. Of course Moscow was not Hawaii but it was August and still warm enough. Russian winters were tough and Auggie hated snow since he had gone blind. Snow made it difficult for him to walk with his cane and sounds and noise were different since the snow altered them. Auggie got easier disoriented when the street an sidewalks were covered with snow.

Now Natasha and Auggie were sitting in Tash´s favourite café close to the Red Square. They had ordered typical Russian cake and Natasha was about to pour hot tea from a Samuvar, a typical Russian tea-maker when she was almost startled by a voice behind her. „Hey Natasha, good to see you again!" Natasha turned round to face the person that was talking to her and looked into the eyes of Ekatarina Golinova, her best friend at school long time ago. „Hey Katrina" Natasha replied and pulled her friend into a warm embrace. Auggie had listened to the scene quietly. Then Natasha turned to face him and said „Katrina, this is Auggie my boyfriend" Ekatarina looked towards Auggie and realized that he did not meet her gaze. Then she looked back to Natasha and asked

„Is he...?" And before she could finish, Auggie said „Yes, I am blind" He had listened to the conversation and had guessed what Ekatarina wanted to know. Ekatarina blushed and Tash tried to lighten the awkward mood by saying „Have a cup of tea with us Katrina" And Ekatarina took a seat at the table. Shortly after the three were in the middle of an interesting conversation about Russia, Russian culture and about the time Tash and Katrina had spent together at school and college. Of course Katrina did not know about Natasha´s hacking and spy activities and she had no idea who Auggie really was. Auggie had burst into laughter a couple of times when Tash and Katrina talked about school and the tricks they had played on their class mates and teachers when they were teenagers. To him it felt so good to talk about something else than life-threatening missions and spycraft. However, he noticed a change in his relationship with Tash the more time he spend with her.

Auggie sat in their hotel room, a braille book on his knees and was reading whilst Natasha was surfing the internet with her laptop. Suddenly Auggie stopped sliding his hands across the page and said „You were embarassed today Tash, weren´t you?" Natasha looked up from her screen, facing Auggie who was sitting across from her in an armchair. „When should I have been embarassed today?" She asked with a questioning look on her face that Auggie of course could not see. „Well, when your friend Katrina noticed I was blind I thought you felt a bit uncomfortable to admit that your boyfriend is disabled" Now Natasha felt really uncomfortable. She knew about Auggie´s intuition to pick up on cues that were not visual but she also felt like she was „discovered". Deep down inside she started to feel some doubts whether she would be able to be with a visually disabled man. She loved Auggie. She had already known him before Iraq when he was still sighted and the first encounter with him as a blind man at the Data Tech computer fair 4 years ago had been a huge shock for her. When he tried to get away with her on that train she had noticed that she was still in love. But sometimes it really started to bother her that she had to be his eyes when they were out and that she had to take care that everything remained in the same place to allow Auggie to get around without problems. She really loved him but she did not dare to broach the subject when they were together. She did not want to hurt him and so she was a bit startled that he had noticed her insecurity.

After hesitating for some seconds she replied „Embarassed is the wrong term in this case, but you are right, I felt a bit uncomfortable for the way my friend looked at you. I guess she has never met a blind person. To me you are not less because you cannot see. I want you to know that. You are so capable in many ways even as a blind person you are still a brilliant hacker and I admire you. Auggie smiled. He believed her. He got up from his seat, felt for the table next to him, put the book down and made his way to Natasha who was sitting on a desk chair. With his hand slightly outstretched he felt for her and pulled her into a hug. Holding Tash in his arms felt good, but at the same time, he started to have some doubts regarding the future of this relationship.

Langley at the same time:

Annie threw her hands up in exasperation and slammed down the receiver of her phone. This new agent really got on her nerves. He had not stopped discussing with her since he had started working for the CIA about 4 weeks ago. He never listened to her advice, he always had his own strategies and he almost ruined the success of two missions due to his stubborn behaviour. Annie checked her wrist watch. She was due for a meeting with Joan in ten minutes. She picked up her pen and a notepad and started walking out of the office. Shortly after, she sat in Joans office and her boss started the conversation „I heard you have some trouble with your new colleague Annie? He reminds me a lot of you when you started working for us."

Annie did not know what to reply. To be compared with this guy was hard to bear but deep down inside she knew Joan was right. She had also acted on her own terms and had refused to listen to advice from day 1. Working with David was just like looking into a mirror and the picture she saw was not always pleasant. „Well, let´s say we have a different approach when it comes to work." Annie said „This is a nice description of your new colleague." Joan smiled and then she said. „Let´s get down to business now. Your new mission is a guy in LA. We have had him on our radar for some time, because we suspect, that he is involved in money laundry for the Russian Mafia. During the conversation Annie wrote down all the details and immediately thought of Tash and Auggie and with a little sigh she said. I wish Auggie was still here. Joan nodded and replied."Yeah, I wish that, too". She missed Auggie as much as Annie did but she would never admit that.

After their trip to Moscow Auggie wanted to go home. They had spent three weeks in Natasha´s hometown and she had shown him her country. He had even learned a few words in Russian and Tash had laughed about his funny American accent. Auggie had even bought a Babushka Doll. The traditional Russian dolls made of wood, that could be opened and every doll had a smaller one inside. Now Auggie and Tash were on a plane to DC and Auggie was looking forward to going home after almost three months of absence. Natasha was sound asleep and her head rested against Auggie´s shoulder. Auggie kept his eyes closed but he did not sleep. Too much was going on in his head. He had thought that he could live without his job at the CIA. He had been exhausted after everything he had gone through. He had been kidnapped by Belenko, he had been tortured and finally his life had been at stake again when Langer tried to kill him and Dekkart with a gas bomb. He had been so tired and even if he had been sighted,it would have been a lot to bear. But now, after the long vacation with Natasha he felt like he was ready again for a new challenge, ready for his job. But there was no way back. He had resigned, Joan and Calder had accepted and he had to look for new perspectives so to speak. And that was not easy.

The question was: what should he do? He had never worked elsewhere. Who would like to take on a blind computer geek even if he was skilled and provided a lot of experience?

At the CIA nobody had questioned his capabilities. He was just like any other collegue and he had no disability bonus when he made mistakes. The CIA appreciated him for his computer skills and for many other things but anywhere else he was just a blind man. People used to underestimate him when they realized that he was blind. Of course he could not see and he often needed help but he was not a cripple and not entirely helpless.

Auggie opened the door to his apartment trailing his suitcase behind. Natasha followed him and brought her suitcase up to the bedroom. She was longing for a long hot shower and she was tired. „What are you doing?" Auggie called from the kitchen „I am taking off my clothes, to get under the shower" she replied. With a roguish grin on his face Auggie said „let me check on you before you get under the shower" and then he made his way to the bedroom. „Wanna take a shower with me?" Tash teased when he had reached her and he said „what a stupid question" and then he started to unbutton his shirt.


	3. Chapter 3

Starting from scratch

Auggie walked along the sidewalk. He had done some shopping. Natasha was still asleep. It had been a long night so to speak. Auggie found the traffic light with the tip of his cane, felt for the curb, pressed the button and waited for the sound to announce that the lights were green. After a few seconds he heard a beeping sound and the second he started walking, he felt someone grabbing his arm. Auggie was startled and shook off the hand of the other person. „Hey what are you doing?" He asked annoyed and the man next to him said „I just wanted to be helpful." Auggie turned his head into the direction of the voice and said „If I need help I will ask!" And then he continued walking across the street, until he felt the curb with the tip of his cane and stepped up onto the sidewalk again. He counted the steps and blocks and after ten minutes he reached his house. He took the elevator and when he came home, he heard the coffee maker. Obviously Tash was up and had prepared coffee. He folded his cane, put it on the credenza together with his keys and took off his leather jacket.

Seconds later Tash came down the stairs wrapped into a bathrobe, her hair still damp. She walked towards Auggie and hugged him. „Hey Darling, where have you been?" Auggie smiled and held up a paper bag with fresh rolls and French Croissants. „I was at the bakery to get us some breakfast treats". And then he walked to his kitchen, opened the drawer to get some cutlery and took two plates and coffee mugs from the shelves above. Counting his steps carefully, he put everything on the kitchen counter and added some napkins. The coffee was ready and Tash watched Auggie pouring two cups without spilling a drop. She was always amazed at how easily Auggie managed every day tasks without seeing. „You are staring at me!" Auggie had noticed that he was being watched. „I can´t help it. I love to watch you working in the kitchen. „ Tash replied with a smile in her voice. A minute later both were sitting at the kitchen counter enjoying their breakfast. When they had almost finished, Auggie´s cell phone rang. „Annie Walker calling." the phone announced. Auggie was surprised. He had not heard from Annie since he had left and he was curious what she might want.

Auggie felt for the phone in his pocket, tapped the screen twice to take the call and said „Hey Walker, what´s up?" And then he heard „It is so good to hear your voice my friend" Auggie smiled. „Don´t tell me you miss me Walker" „ I actually do" Annie replied. And then she continued „ But this is not the only reason I am calling you. Auggie I need your help!"

Auggie was curious and surprised. „What do you need Annie?" He asked „It is not so easy to explain. We have a new agent in Langley and I am at my wits end. He does not listen to me, he acts on his own terms and he has almost gone rogue some time ago on a mission. Auggie, you always know what to do. Help me to „tame" this guy". Auggie grinned and then he answered „ Well this story sounds quite familiar and reminds me a bit of a certain operative who took a blind guy to a morgue on her first mission and almost left him standing outside on his own". Annie had listened to Auggie´s monologue and she added „Auggie, I am serious, I really need your advice."

Now Auggie noticed that Annie was not joking. „What do you want me to do?" he enquiered. „Well, first of all I would appreciate your starting your laptop. „Done!" Auggie said and walked over to his desk where he booted the new laptop McQuaid had brought him. He loved this device since it did not require an extra Braille display to use it blind. He had just started the computer and put on his head phones when a sound announced „you got an e-mail" Auggie opened the file that Annie had sent him. It contained mission details. Of course he knew, that agents were not allowed to pass secret information on to other civilians but Auggie was not any person and he and Annie were sure that Calder and Joan would understand. Auggie read the file. It was a complicated code. Trying to decipher it required some experience and he liked challenges.

About 24 hours later Auggie got the hang of it. He had deciphered the text but he could not understand it. It was all written in a Russian dialect. Annie spoke some Russian, too but she could not understand all the details either. The only way to find out about the file was Natasha. She would be able to help. Auggie was sure that he could trust her. She was still wanted by the FBI and she would not risk her life or her freedom by deceiving oder betraying him and the USA.

Auggie typed, whilst Natasha was translating the file from Russian into English. They had already gotten halfway through the page, when Auggie suddenly stopped typing, tried to face Natasha and asked „Have you ever considered staying in the USA for good?" Natasha hesitated a moment before she replied „Yeah, when I met you, I became acquainted with the idea to stay here forever, I mean to stay with you. However, when I realized that there was this Hayley girl I had second thoughts and considered to go back to my home country." Auggie swallowed. This was an honest answer. What he loved about Natasha was her honesty. She would always be direct and straight forward. Sometimes it was an advantage, but sometimes it could hurt, too.

After an awkward minute of silence Auggie said „Let´s continue" And then Natasha started again with her translation of the dossier in her hand. Afer an hour, the job was done and Auggie took off his head phones. Again, Natasha had admired him for the way his hands flew across the keyboard and from time to time across the Braille line below, checking the content he had just typed and written. Auggie had immediately posted the translation as an attachment of an e-mail to Annie, so that she could continue with her job. Auggie felt satisfied. He had missed the feeling to be good at something, to be needed and to have accomplished something that made sense by the end of a day. Today was a good day he thought by himself. He shut down the computer and walked to the fridge to get a bottle of beer for Natasha and for himself. Then he walked to the couch, sat down and held out the second bottle for Natasha who took it and sipped on it immediately.

Annie was delighted. She had just received Auggie´s message with the file. She was grateful. Her best, blind friend was as loyal as always and prepared to help her out in case she needed him. There had been so many men in her life but all of them had died oder disappeared. Ben, Dr. Scott, Eyal, Simon and now Ryan. She loved him but the feelings for him were so different from those she had for Auggie. She and Auggie had been together for a while but it had not worked, well...if she was honest, she had not given it the time to work. She had left, had gone dark and she had hurt the man she loved so much. When she had come back she had felt guilty and she had felt unable to explain what was going on with her. First, there was this heart problem and then she did not want to hurt Auggie, because she did not know what this condition meant for her. She did not want to make Auggie suffer because she was sick. Therefore she maintained her distance. To protect herself and to protect Auggie. Now, she was glad, that she had something to get further with her mission. The only problem was David. If he continued acting the way he had acted before, he might jeopardize the whole mission. She dialled David´s cell phone number and left a message on his mailbox, telling him to be in Langley at 8:30 for a briefing.

Auggie was nervous, he was desperately searching for his cane. He knew that he had left it on the credenza as always. Without his cane he could not go out. „Tash" he called „Have you seen my cane?" Natasha did not reply immediately, she was in the bathroom drying her hair with a hair dryer. „Tash!" Auggie called again and made his way towards the bathroom. When he stood on the threshold of the bathroom door Natasha finally reacted. „Hey, what´s up?" she asked. „ I am looking for my cane." Auggie answered and in an annoyed tone he added „Looking might be exaggerated in my case. Feeling, would be a better term." Now Natasha realized that Auggie was angry. „ I put your cane on the bed when I was dust cleaning." She said with an innocent smile. „Tash, how often have I told you, that you have to put the things back at their usual place. Otherwise, I am pretty lost. When I cannot find something it takes me a long time to feel around every room to trace it." Now Tash was annoyed as well. „I did not think you were this picky!" she said. „I am not picky!" Auggie said; almost getting furious „ I am just asking you to take a bit more care with everything you do, as long as you are here with me! As you have probably noticed I AM BLIND! Changes in my environment can make me extremely helpless when I don´t know about them!" And with that, he walked away, almost stumbling over the first step of the stairs leading down to the living room area. "Dammit ! he cursed and continued walking down the stairs.

Auggie was confused. Every day he questioned himself more, if Natasha was really the right girl for him. Of course he loved her and she loved him, but there were so many things, that seemed to be wrong about this relationship. First, there was her inability to keep things in their usual place, then she was boring herself to death because she had no real job, and what hurt Auggie the most, was the fact, that Tash obviously was embarassed that he was blind. Not only in Moscow, but also a few times after their vacation, he had noticed that she felt uncomfortable visiting public places with a blind boyfriend. I have to make a decision, Auggie thought. But he was not sure when and how. Then he grabbed his cane and left his loft. He needed to go for a walk to clear his head.


	4. Chapter 4

Starting from scratch part 4

Tapping his cane back and forth in front of him and clearing the way, Auggie walked along the sidewalk. So much was going on in his head and he needed time to think. Time ALONE. He had been with Tash for more than two months and he had barely had a minute alone since then. Time to think about what was happening and about how he wanted to proceed in the future. After a 5-minutes walk he reached the pub. He trailed the tip of his white cane along the wall to find the door. Reached for the door handle and entered. As soon as he got in, he heard the voice of Jeff, the owner. „Hey Auggie, up for a beer? Do you want me to take you to a table?" Auggie nodded. He was grateful for that extra service. According to the sounds, the pub was crowded at this time of the evening and that made it difficult for him to get around. Seconds later Jeff reached him and offered Auggie his arm to guide him. He showed Auggie a table whilst one of his employees served Auggie the beer he usually used to drink.

Auggie took a seat, folded his cane, put it on the table and felt for the beer glass in front of him. Whilst enjoying his beer, Auggie was lost in thought. The last time he had visited this pub had been with Tony. But now, like many others of his former unit, Tony was gone. Dekkart and Auggie himself were the only survivors of the military unit that had served in Iraq. The time at the military service had changed his life a lot. Not only had he lost his sight, he also had lost many friends and had become a true soldier inside who tried to keep his emotions close to the vest. It was not easy for him to show how he was feeling. But there was one thing that he knew for sure. He had to talk to Natasha as soon as possible.

When Auggie returned two hours later, his loft was quiet. It was around 11 p.m. No TV sounds, no radio playing...he assumed that Tash was already asleep so he entered quietly and tried not to make too much noise. He folded his cane, put his leather jacket on the coat hanger and slowly made his way towards the bedroom. Sneaking closer to the bed, he felt for the place where he thought that Natasha would be but the bed was empty. SHE WAS GONE! Natasha had left without a word. Auggie was now even more confused than before. Should he be glad that it was not up to him to make a decision or should he be sad that she left without talking to him? He went back to the kitchen to grab a bottle of water from the fridge. When he felt for the surface of the kitchen counter to put the bottle down, he felt that there was a piece of paper. A note from Natasha he thought.

He took the paper, started his document reader and put the paper on the scanner. Seconds later the voice of the reading device said „I am sorry Auggie, I can´t do this. Tash". Okay, he thought. Natasha had left and he had spared the effort to make a decision himself. And the fact, that she left him a note, that he normally would be unable to read, showed him that she knew very little about his world as a blind man. She could have sent him a voice mail to make it easier for him but she didn´t. It is better this way, Auggie thought, although he was still disappointed and hurt. Right now he remembered the time with Annie. Especially one particular evening in his loft, when he had talked about Helen. Annie had said „You will never lose me by telling me the truth" And for the first time in years he had desparately wished to be able to see, to see her face. With this memory old feelings came to the surface, feelings he had buried a while ago but he could not deny it. He still loved Annie. But now she was with Ryan. So there was no chance for him to conquer her heart again.

„Stay where you are" Annie shouted into her headset. David on the other side of the line remained quiet for a second but then started „but...Annie...Annie I just..." Annie was getting mad „I don´t wanna hear a BUT...just one damned time you should do what I am telling you" Annie slammed her fist on the desk and ended the call. Handling David was a tough job and she had not got the nerves to discuss all the time with this rookie agent. Annie dialled Barber´s extension number and told him to arrange for an extraction team to get David out of Russia.

Barber and Annie had just stopped talking, when the phone rang again „We have your agent, wait for our instructions." A voice said in English with a very strong Russian accent. Annie was shocked. It looked like David had not listened to her. But this time the consequences were serious. He was in the „claws" of the Russian Mafia and getting him out safe and sound was a real challenge and there was a lot at stake.

Annie was desperate. If only Auggie were here she thought. Barber was an excellent hacker as well but in some cases he was not as skilled as Auggie. Annie was tempted to call Auggie´s cell number but then she decided to try to solve the problem alone. She had to inform Joan and this conversation would not be pleasant. She was sure that Joan would blame her for the mission that had gone so awfully wrong. Annie prepared herself for the worst and walked to Joan´s office. She knocked and after a second she heard „Please come in!" Annie opened the door and took a seat on the chair across from Joan. „To what do I owe the pleasure of your visit Annie?" Annie hesitated a bit and played a bit with a strand of her hair before she replied „Well...I have to tell you that David is obviously in the hands of the Russian Mob" Joan frowned „ I beg you pardon? Could you be more precise please?" And then Annie started her story about David who had again refused to listen to her advice and who had been captured by the Russian Mafia now.

„This is incredible" Joan said. And then she continued „How much do we know about his location? Do we know how many people are around?" „No, we have only been informed that he was captured and that we should wait for further instructions." Annie replied. „Then ,all we can do is wait." Joan said in an annoyed tone. „ Has Barber tried to locate his cell phone?" she added.

„Yes, but obviously it is off. After the call we have lost touch. Maybe the Mob guys have destroyed it to keep us from tracing David."

Annie was frustrated. Her first bigger mission as a handler had gone terribly wrong. Now she understood what Auggie had felt when she was out there on her own and he could not protect her from the distance. If only Auggie was here she thought again. Maybe he would have an idea how to deal with the situation. And then all of a sudden Annie thought I HAVE TO CALL AUGGIE.

Seconds later she dialled Auggie´s cell phone number and soon she heard his voice on the other side of the line. „Hey Walker, how are you doing? Still longing for my company?" He quipped.

„Auggie, stopp kidding me. I am in an awful situation. I need your help. I NEED YOU." Auggie smiled these words were so good to hear. He had missed the feeling to be useful and needed. „What do you need?" He asked. „I need you to find David." Annie answered. „Okay, let me get ready I will be with you in half an hour" „You wanna come to Langley?" Annie asked incredulously. No, but I thought you would like me to come to your apartment. Or are you still at work?" Annie swallowed „No, I am actually in my car on my way back home" „Excellent, pick me up on your way home. I ´ll be ready in ten minutes". Auggie put on his shoes, grabbed his leather jacket, his messenger bag with the laptop and his cane and made his way down the stairs. He had just closed the door of the building when he heard a car approach and a familiar voice „Hey handsome guy, do you need a ride?" Auggie followed the sound of the voice, found the car, trailed his hand along the side to find the door. He folded his cane and took a seat next to Annie.


	5. Chapter 5

Starting from scratch part 5

Annie and Auggie kept quiet during their ride to Annie´s apartment. After 10 minutes they arrived and Annie got out of her car. She opened the door for Auggie and offered him her lead into the house. Auggie had not been to her new flat yet and so he appreciated her help. He took her elbow, unfolded his cane and followed her into the house.

Annie led Auggie to her couch and showed him the couch table where he could set up his laptop. Auggie booted the programme, put his headphones on an let his „Hummingbird" fly around Russia. Hummingbird could not only log into security cameras everywhere, it also allowed to use satellites for surveillance. Annie gave him he co-ordinates of the place David had been before they had lost touch and Auggie searched the area with his programme. Not far from the place David had been before there was a huge forest. Deep in the woods the satellite picture showed a wooden cabin. A perfect place to hide Auggie thought. But how should he get a team to that place without being noticed. As a foreigner this would be even more complicated.

„Did you find something?" Annie asked. „I actually did" Auggie said. „This cabin not far from the outskirts of Moscow could be a perfect place to hide. Far enough not to be detected, but still close enough to the mainroads in case you have to escape." „Great" Annie said „But how can we check if we are right? We have no colleagues down there right now and getting there takes much too long. David is in real danger." And then she remembered what Belenko had said to her. Your enemy´s enemy is your friend. Belenko was furious because the FSB had betrayed him. He even said that he deeply regretted what he had done to Auggie so he owed them one or at least he owed Auggie.

Belenko was still in CIA custody and she would try to get an appointment for a visit.

**24 hours later:**

Auggie and Annie entered the building. A security officer led them to the room where Belenko was waiting. The officer opened the door and let Annie and Auggie in. Belenko was sitting on a chair, curious to see who wanted to visit him. He lifted his brows in surprise when he saw the two come closer.

„To what do I owe the pleasure of your visit Ms. Walker and Mr. Anderson?" „Well let´s say we want to remind you of the promise you made before we came back to the US." Annie said.

„What promise?" Belenko enquired. And then Auggie added „You said that you wanted to help us as a compensation for what you did to me. Now I am taking your word for it and I want you to pull a few strings in Russia. We need your connections to the Russian Mafia".

Belenko had listened to Auggie and frowned before he asked „And what kind of support would that be?" Now Annie spoke up again. „One of our agents is in danger. He is in the hands of the Russian Mob. We need him to get out of there, we need him alive. We know that you have „friends" - or however you call these people - everywhere so please use your connections to help us and it will sure have a pleasant effect on your stay here at the correctional centre." Belenko shifted a bit in his chair, thinking about a possible answer. Then he said „Let us assume I am prepared to help you, how would I possibly do that. I haven´t even access to a phone here" „I will see to it that you get one." Annie said and then she added „And by the way, you have not seen Auggie here, right?" Belenko grinned and replied „I am blind in one eye." Auggie had listened to the banter and said „ I didn´t know we had something in common." Annie had also asked the security guard not to mention that she was not alone just in case Joan or Calder would ask.

**Two hours later:**

Annie had talked to Joan and had informed her, that Belenko was prepared to help them out. Joan and Calder were now on their way to the correctional centre to meet Belenko. When the two got into the visitors´s room Belenko kept his promise. He did not mention that Auggie had been there, too.

After a short conversation with the security guard, Calder and Joan left together with Belenko. He wore hand cuffs as a precautionary measure. Arriving in Langley, Joan explained the situation again. Then she passed Belenko her encrypted cell phone and told him to make a call. Belenko did what he was told and within a minute he had a conversation with a so-called friend in Russia. Of course he did not tell his friend that he was in US or more precisely in CIA custody. He just called in a favour, mentioning, that David was the son of one of his business friends in LA. This was enough motivation to induce the other guy to help.

An hour later, Joan was informed that David was free and that he was on his way to the US. A sigh of relieve escaped her lips and she immediately called Annie to let her know what had happened. Before the conversation ended, Joan asked Annie „By the way, I would love to know how you found David so fast. Am I right when I assume that this has to do with a little bird that specializes in finding and tracing people and even more with the guy who developed that programme?" For a second Annie remained quiet. Joan got the hint and said „Well, I knew it, that you did not accomplish that all alone." Annie felt a bit uncomfortable but had no choice and therefore she confessed „You are right. I called Auggie and his Hummingbird helped us to trace David." Joan looked at Annie and explained „ You know that this was a huge breach of the security protocol, right? Auggie is not a CIA member anymore and was not entitled to be involved into the case. But of course I understand your motivation to ask him for support. Tell him I appreciate his help and that I would love to take him on again." And then she added „Just in case he is prepared to come back, of course".

Annie was relieved. The conversation with Joan had gone well and now she was on her way to Auggie. Ten minutes later she knocked on his apartment door. Auggie slid the door open and let her in. „I hope you got good news Walker" He said and grinned „The best news ever" Annie answered. „David is on his way back because Belenko called in a favour". „That is fantastic" Auggie said and extended his hand to find Annie´s shoulder to pull her into an embrace. He hugged her tightly and Annie almost snuggled down in his arms. It felt so good to be in his arms.


	6. Chapter 6

Starting from scratch part 6

Annie walked along the corridor in Langley. She was on her way to her office. Suddenly she heard a familiar sound behind her. Tic, Tac, Tic, Tac...the tapping sound of a cane. This can only be one person she thought, turning to face the person behind her. „Hey Auggie." she smiled her radiant smile and Auggie stopped, resting his hands on top of his cane. „Hey Walker, good to see you again. So to speak." He smirked and turned his head into the direction of her voice. Annie hugged him tightly and Auggie reciprocated her embrace. „So you are joining the CIA club again?" Annie enquiered. „Looks that way." Auggie replied. I have been through the whole introduction procedure for the last two hours. Finger prints, Polygraph and all that stuff. Just like a newbie". „Poor Barber" Annie said „Why is that?" Auggie asked „Well, Eric has made himself at home in your office during your absence and is now forced to give up his space again." Annie explained and then she added „But please don´t tell him that I prefer you to be the one to occupy this office." „I promise I won´t" Auggie answered and made his way towards his old work place.

As already assumed there had been a few changes in his absence and Auggie used his cane to navigate his old/new office. The desk was a bit more in the middle of the room and even the location of the printer was a different one. Auggie slowly felt for the surface of the desk and let his hands slide across it to explore it. At least one thing had not changed. His Braille keyboard was still there and also his document reader and his speakers. As usual, he stowed his white folding cane in the first desk drawer and swapped it for his laser device. It feels so good to be back again. He thought by himself. However, he had to get acquainted again with everything. He had not had any updates about current missions and not even the latest office gossip about who is dating who had reached him. He had to pay Joan a visit to get the latest news. He was about to walk through the door when he heard a voice say. „Wecome back Mr. Anderson." That was Joan Campbell. She did not want to miss the opportunity to welcome one of her best operatives on his first day back. „Joan!" Auggie´s face lit up. „Good to have you back Auggie." His boss said and patted his shoulder. „I would like to see you in my office in 15 minutes to give you the latest updates. I am waiting for you." „I ´ll be there" Auggie replied before he walked through the door to get to the cafeteria to get some coffee. He had to keep his caffeine level up to be able to function.

Fifteen minutes later Auggie sat in Joan´s office sipping on a cup of coffee to go and listened to Joan´s instructions. When she had finished, she said. I am so glad to have you back Auggie. I missed you. „Thanks Joan. It feels so good to be useful and needed again" He said and smiled into Joan´s direction, adding, „Anyway, I could use some distraction, too." Joan looked at him and said „ I take it that your relationship with Natasha Petrovna is music of the past?" Auggie swallowed a bit trying to hide his emotions and replied „Yes, that is the case and I honestly don´t want to think about that anymore." Joan understood and said „Okay, then let´s get down to business again. You got all the details you need. Good luck!" Auggie rose from his seat, switched on his laser and made his way towards the door, the familiar green light pattern showing him the way.

Back at his desk, Auggie booted his desktop computer, put his head phones on and read the files, Joan had sent him by e-mail. Here, we go again operative Anderson he said, smiling to himself.

Then news that Auggie was back had spread quickly and one „old" colleague after the other appeared in Auggie´s office to welcome him. Auggie was interrupted countless times when one colleague after the other showed up at his desk.

**The next morning**

Auggie had slept like a baby after his first day back in Langley. He was now standing under the shower preparing himself for a new working day. The day before, he had worked overtime to get everything done properly.

He had just wrapped himself into a fluffy white towel and wanted to start shaving, when there was suddenly a knock on the door. He walked to the door, slid it open and heard the voice of Annie. „Good morning handsome, would you like me to give you a ride to the office?" „There is nothing I would love more." He replied and added „Feels like we are back to the good old times, are we?" „I guess so." Annie said watching Auggie disappear towards his bedroom to get dressed. „What about Mc Quaid?" Auggie called from his bedroom. „Well, let´s say we are on a break" Annie answered.

Auggie didn´t know what to reply. Should he be glad that Ryan was gone? Annie was still in his heart but he was not sure whether she felt still the same for him. He did not want to get hurt again. The wound Natasha had left was still fresh and healing and he could not deal with another loss again. Five minutes later he emerged from the bedroom, dressed in dark-blue jeans, a light-grey shirt and a dark-blue vest with a grey-blue tie. He looked as handsome as always and directly walked to the coffeemaker to pour himself a cup of strong black coffee. „Would you like some coffee, too?" He asked and Annie answered „Yeah, a cup of black coffee would be great". Auggie took two cups from the shelf above the sink and slowly poured two cups. He handed one to Annie who had come closer to take the cup out of Auggie´s hand. Between a few sips of coffee Annie asked „How was your first day back in Langley?" „Auggie turned towards Annie´s voice and replied „Well, the day was good but it felt awkward. Just like starting from scratch. First of all I had to re-arrange my office furniture. Being blind sometimes really sucks." Annie was surprised, Auggie rarely talked about his life as a blind man and seldom mentioned how difficult simple things could be for him.

Half an hour later they were back at the office. Annie checked her e-mails when suddenly a call came in. Joan asked her to come to her office. Annie immediately walked to the elevator that would take her to the third floor. When she arrived, she found already Auggie sitting in an armchair across from Joan. She patted Auggie´s shoulder to greet him and took a seat next to him. „You both know why I have asked you to come to my office, right?" Joan started the conversation. „Well, I am not sure" Annie said with a questioning look on her face. „I am grateful that the mission, that went so terribly wrong in the beginning turned out well. Although your decision to involve Auggie into the search for David was a huge breach of the security protocol. Auggie was not a CIA member at that time and if he had not been a former operative of the CIA I would have had to discipline you Annie." Joan added. „Considering that Auggie is now back at the CIA and that David is safe, I will leave the whole issue undisciplined." Thank you Joan „ Annie said rising from her seat and touching the back of Auggie´s hand to offer him her lead. Auggie rose as well and the two walked out of the office.

„That couldn´t have gone better" Auggie said when they had closed the door behind them and smiled. „We are still a good team Auggie, aren´t we?" Annie asked. „Sure Walker" he replied with a grin.


	7. Chapter 7

Starting from scratch part 7

Auggie had re-arranged the furniture in his office and had made himself at home again. It didn´t take very long for him to get acquainted again with the surroundings and the job itself. After three days back in Langley, he asked himself how he could have believed that he could live without his job. With hindsight he could not understand his decision to leave the CIA.

At 9:00 and after his first coffee, Auggie made his way to Annie´s desk only to find it empty. He was worried because his colleague and ex-lover was not there. Annie was never off sick, at least not without letting him know. He continued his walk through the bull pen area and decided to ask Joan. Five minutes, later he knocked on Joan´s door. „Come in" he heard after a few seconds. He opened the door and walked towards Joan´s desk.

„Can I ask you something Joan?" Auggie started the conversation. Joan looked up from her computer screen and stopped typing. „Of course, what is it?" Auggie hesitated a bit „Well...I wanted to see Annie, but she was not at her desk. Do you know something?" Joan got up from her seat, walked around her desk to face Auggie and said „No, I don´t know where she is. All I know is, that she has called to tell me that she will come two hours later because she has something important to do". Auggie frowned. What could that be? He thought. As her best friend, she would have told him, if something was wrong. „Thanks Joan" Auggie turned, disappointed, that he could not find out more and left the office.

Annie sat in the waiting area of the hospital. She was nervous. I was already 9:30 a.m. and her appointment had been scheduled for 9:15. Annie hated it to wait. Even more, when the appointment was important. And this one, was of enormous importance. The result would determine her professional future, her future at the CIA. Annie played a bit with her mobile phone in her hand. Then she heard a voice calling „Ms. Annie Walker please!" Annie rose from her seat, put her phone into her handbag and followed the nurse. „Please take a seat" the nurse said when she and Annie had reached an examination room. Annie looked around and finally took a seat. Two minutes later a doctor entered the room.

„Hello Ms. Walker" he said and shook hands with Annie."As I can take from your medical records, you are suffering from Myocarditis and you are here for a medical check-up." Annie looked at the doctor and replied „Yes, that is right and to be honest, there is a lot at stake for me. I mean professionally. My job depends on the results of this examination." The doctor smiled and said „Your personal health should be your priority but of course I understand your concern." And then he added „Please take off your blouse and lay down on the examination table. I would like to have an ultrasound of your heart". Annie took off her blouse and when she was on the examination table the doctor spread some cold gel on her chest to start the ultrasound examination. After 15 minutes the test was over and Annie asked „How does it look?" The doctor looked at her and said „We are not done yet, I need the whole picture. A nurse will now draw some blood for a test, she will take your pulse and your blood pressure and we will of course need an ECG."

Annie was still nervous. The whole procedure took too long for her taste. But she had to follow the doctor´s instructions. So she got up from the examination table, put her blouse on and waited for the nurse. A minute later, an older nurse appeared with a tray in her hand. She rolled up the sleeve of Annie´s blue blouse, attached a torniquet and starting drawing blood. Annie looked away. She could not see her own blood.

About an hour later the whole procedure was over. Annie was glad. She was hungry and needed some coffee, too. The medical check-up had required fasting. On her way to Langley she stopped at a diner to get some coffee and two muffins.

When she finally reached her desk she found a piece of paper. „Please call me as soon as you´re back" The note was from Auggie. That was for sure. Although he was blind, he could still write but the handwriting itself was a bit strange and not easy to read for her.

Annie took the last sip of her caffé latte to go and swallowed the last crumbs of her blueberry muffin and walked towards Auggie´s office. Auggie was typing a letter when he suddenly heard the door open. He lifted his head, turned into the direction of the door and said „Who is it?" Annie smiled „It is me, Auggie" „Hey Walker where have you been?" Annie hesitated unsure whether to tell the truth or not but then she said „I had an appointment with my cardiologist. I did not want you to be worried. It is enough when I am nervous." Auggie got up from his desk chair, trailed his hand along the edge of the desk and walked towards Annie. „I hope you got good news" He said.

„Well, it remains to be seen how everything will turn out, I will get the final results in three days." „Three days? That is a long time. Isn´t it?" „Yeah, it definitely is and to be honest I am scared" Annie admitted. „I would be scared, too if I were you" Auggie answered and felt for her shoulder to pull her into a hug. Annie enjoyed his embrace and reciprocated with a kiss on his left cheek.

The next three days were endless. At least it seemed like that to Annie. She could not wait to have the result of her check-up. On Friday Morning, when she had just finished her shower, her cell phone rang. She wrapped herself into a huge towel and walked into the kitchen where her cell phone lay on the table „Annie Walker" she said „Dr. James Madison" said the voice on the other end. Annie trembled with fear. What if the cardiologist had bad news and her heart condition was not gone? „I hope you got good news" She said. „Well, considering the seriousness of that condition yes. It is my pleasure, to tell you that everything is back to normal and that your job – whatever this job is – is not at stake.

Annie was speechless. After all these months and countless episodes that had left her short of breath, fainting and losing consciousness, she was relieved to hear that the danger was gone. „Thank you so much doctor" Annie said and tears of relieve ran down her cheeks.

Half an hour later she was back in Langley and the first thing she did was to walk to Auggie´s office. He had been as worried as she had been herself and he deserved it to be the first to know. When she reached Auggie´s office, his chair was empty. Annie was disappointed. Where could he be? She wanted to share this important news with her best friend and colleague. She had just reached her desk again when she heard a familiar sound. The tapping sound of a cane. Auggie walked past her desk, assuming she was not there yet when suddenly Annie called „Hey Auggie" Auggie turned, directed his gaze towards Annie´s voice and said „Hey Walker, you´re already here? I didn´t know that." Annie looked up to him and replied „I have just arrived and wanted to pay you a visit but you were not in your office" „I was in a meeting with Barber and the other Tech Ops guys. I have not been in my office yet" And he waved a bit with his cane. Usually immediately after his arrival in the office Auggie swapped his white cane for the laser. But this time, his first way had led him to the conference room where the other Tech Ops guys were waiting for him.

„Do you wanna come with me?" Auggie said and as a reply Annie brushed her hand against the back of Auggie´s hand and he took her lead. In the office Auggie felt for the edge of his desk, trailed his left hand along the side and finally opened the top drawer to stow his cane. „I want to tell you something and you are the first to know" Annie said. She could not wait any longer. And then she continued with tears again in her eyes „I am fit for field work again. My Myocarditis is cured!"


	8. Chapter 8

Starting from scratch part 8

Auggie could not believe what he had just heard. He was very happy that Annie had such good news. He had been as worried as she was in the last months and it had been tough not to make his concern for her health too obvious.

„Annie that is great" Auggie said and had to fight his tears. Deep inside, he was still in love with her. But she was with Ryan now and for him there was no way to win her back. In order to hide his emotions Auggie now turned a bit towards his desk pretending to be looking for something, sliding his hands across the surface of the desk. Annie was confused now. She walked towards Auggie´s desk and asked „What´s up with you?" Auggie made no attempt to meet her gaze or to follow her voice by turning his head. He just replied „Nothing" and started typing on his Braille keyboard.

Annie shook her head in disbelief, unable to understand what was going on. Then she turned on her heel and left the office. Finally! Auggie thought when she was gone. He had had a hard time to hide his emotions. Fortunately she had not dug deeper and asked him questions. After all, he was still a guy who kept his emotions close to the vest.

Annie´s next way led her to Joan. She had to tell her the good news and maybe she would be soon out in the field again instead of sitting at her desk trying desparately to handle stubborn, rookie agents who did not listen to her instructions.

Annie and Ryan had opened a bottle of red Bardolino wine to celebrate. Annie had snuggled down next to Ryan on her couch and he had put his arm around her shoulders. Ryan turned towards her and after a long passionate kiss he asked. „How did Joan react?" „Well, she said that she wanted to send me on missions again soon but she also said that I´d better start slowly. She is still scared that something might happen to me. But I am not a rookie anymore. I have been working for the agency for more than 5 years now." Ryan looked at her and said „But maybe she is right. There is no hurry. You still got a job at the CIA and that is what counts." Now Annie was disappointed. Nobody seemed to trust her capabilities and instincts anymore„You share her opinion?" She asked and Ryan answered „To a certain degree, yes. I love you and I don´t want to lose you again."

Auggie sat on his couch. He was tired. The day in Langley had been long and exhausting for him. He did not like to admit that but being blind made many things more complicated. Despite special technology it always took him a bit longer to do research or to read files and documents. Everything required more time and above all more concentration. He thought of Annie and of everything that had happened before Henry and before she had gone dark. He knew, that he still loved her but did she love him, too? Maybe she had taken Henry as an excuse to leave. Maybe it was his disability that made it hard for her to love him? His blindness was not reversible that was something she knew for sure.

Auggie woke up tired. He was glad that it was Saturday and that he had not to get up early. He groped a bit for his alarm clock on the nightstand, pressed the talk button and heard „It is 6:30 a.m." He turned again in his bed and drifted off to sleep again. At 9:30 he got up to make himself some coffee. He started the coffeemaker and went into the bathroom to take a shower. He slowly dressed himself and then went down the stairs to the kitchen. He put a finger across the rim of a cup to pour himself some coffee and sat down at the kitchen counter. He still could not get rid of the idea that Annie might reject him because of his blindness. In his usual environment he could function just like anybody else but in unknown places he needed assistance and could even be pretty helpless. He had been blind for more than seven years now and he had adapted to his visual disability but there were still times, when he cursed his blindness and all the restrictions that a life without vision imposed on him. Auggie needed to clear his head and the best way to do that was some physical exercise. He could not go jogging but he could go for a walk or to the gym.

He packed his bag, throwing in a t-shirt, sweat-pants, a towel, shower gel and some shoes. Then he grabbed his cane from the credenza, put on his leather jacket and made his way to the gym two blocks further down the street.

After 15 minutes he arrived and changed. He also used his cane at the gym to find the right place. He knew that everyone was watching him. Usually, it did not bother him but today he was not in the mood to deal with it. He knew he needed the cane to get around, but on the other hand it drew more attention to him and his disability than he could bear. Auggie found the bench and started with a bit of weight lifting, then he went over to the treadmill for running and finally he let off steam by hitting the sandbag. The frustration about Annie being with Mc Quaid now and the frustration about his blindness made him hit the bag harder than before. After almost two hours his shirt was soaked and sweat was running down his forehead.

He made his way back to the locker room, picked up his towel and shower gel and went to take a shower. On his way to the shower he could not use his cane and so he extended a bit his left hand. After five minutes he was done and on his way back. On the threshold of the door to the locker room he suddenly ran into somebody. The guy was huge, had extremely broad shoulders and was taller than Auggie. „Hey watch, where ya going, or are you blind?" The guy snarled. Auggie was almost getting furious, too many emotions had accumulated in him but he tried to contain himself and snapped back „Yeah, I am blind". All of a sudden the other guy´s behaviour and voice changed and he said „Oh, I´m sorry, didn´t wanna hurt you. Can I help you?" „Thanks, I can hold my own." Auggie replied and trailed his left hand along the wall to continue his way to his locker. He let his hand slide across the various lockers to find his own. He could not read the numbers on the locker doors so counting the lockers was his only option to find the right one.

When he had finally found his own locker, he felt for his bag and started to get dressed again. When he was almost done, the other guy emerged from the shower and watched Auggie unfolding his cane. Auggie sensed that he was being watched and said „Hey, you´re staring at me, right?" The guy was surprised and said „How do ya know?" „Intuition of the blind." Auggie replied. „Are ya some sort of superman with super powers?" The guy continued. Now Auggie smiled „No, just a simple blind guy." he answered. And the other guy asked „Are ya up for a drink man?" _Why not_, Auggie thought. He could use some distraction. And he replied „Ok, I am gonna wait for you in the hall." Auggie made his way to the hall. Next to the reception desk were some chairs and tables and so he found a free table and a chair with his cane and took a seat.

Five minutes later he heard a familiar voice. „Hey man, are ya ready to go?" Auggie rose from his seat, extended his cane and walked towards the sound of the voice. „Where do you want to go?" Auggie asked „There is a pub on the opposite side." The guy said and Auggie wondered again how much information was lost on him because he could not see. He had been at the gym numerous times but he had no idea that there was a pub on the other side of the road. „Okay, let´s go there" Auggie said. „Do you need help?" The guy said and Auggie replied „If I could take your arm, it would be easier for me." „Okay, but how do you know where my arm is?" „Just touch my hand with the back of yours." Auggie answered „But you´re not gay, are you?" The guy grinned. Now Auggie couldn´t help laughing „No" he said „You have never been around a blind person, right?This is just the usual way to help someone who is blind. You need some tricks when you cannot see." „ All right man" the guy said and brushed his hand against Auggie´s and Auggie followed him.

Arriving at the pub, they ordered a beer and after the first sip the guy said „ I am Joe" Auggie lifted his beer jar and replied „My name is Auggie." Auggie and Joe spent an enjoyable time. Joe was the doorman in a discotheque and a regular visitor of the gym. Strange enough, that they had not met yet.

Joe had a lot of funny stories to tell, but when he asked Auggie what his job was, Auggie told him the usual cover story. He was an IT guy and worked for the senate in DC.

„But how can you be in IT, when you cannot see the computer screen?" Joe asked. „I use some special equipment like headphones and a Braille keyboard." Auggie replied. „Wow, and that works for you?" Joe was surprised. „Yes it does." Auggie said and added „Many people underestimate us, but blind people can do a lot with the right assistance and adequate technology".

Two hours later, Auggie was back home. He folded his cane, put it on the credenza and took a seat at his desk. He had enjoyed the conversation with Joe and he had probably made a new friend. The anger he had felt before had subsided a bit. He switched on his computer, put his headphones on and checked all of his new e-mails. After deleting some spam mails he came across an e-mail from Annie

**Hey Auggie,**

**I hope you are not angry with me. I did not know what was going on with you when I told you that my heart condition was cured. Just in case you wanna talk, you know how to reach me.**

**Love**

**Annie**

Auggie let his headphones slide to his neck and mused. What should he tell her, just in case she asked what was going on with him? He could not tell her the truth. She had made her choice and the choice was Ryan. He had no right to cause her trouble by telling her that he was still in love with her. After a few minutes he started typing a reply to Annie

**Hey Annie,**

**I am not angry with you, don´t worry. And If I need to talk to you I will surely let you know.**

**All the best**

**Auggie**

When Auggie had sent the message, he hoped that Annie would not ask him further questions. He went to his fridge to get himself a glass of orange juice. For today he had had enough alcohol with Joe. He set the bottle on the kitchen counter and turned to grab a glass from the shelf. When starting to pour the juice he came across the cane that was still on the counter top. „Dammit" he cursed. „Why did I have to go blind?" He was almost convinced that he had more chances to win Annie´s heart if he were still sighted. And all of a sudden he found himself crying. Something he had not done since the early days in rehab after his injury. A lot of emotions had accumulated and now he felt the need to let it all out. _Annie going dark, Annie coming back and rejecting him, Annie and himself hunting down Belenko, Belenko torturing him and finally the news that Annie was with Ryan now..._All that had been too much for him. But would all of that have happened to him if he were still sighted and not blind? There was no answer to this question and that bothered him.


	9. Chapter 9

Starting from scratch part 9

Auggie got up late. He had had a bad night with nightmares. He asked himself whether he would ever overcome the grief about his sight loss. He had adapted within the last 7 years, yes. He had built himself a good life with an exciting job, yes, but from time to time it all came back to him. The unpleasant memories and what happened in Tikrit, the time after in rehab and the sadness about a life without vision. He had learned to deal with his disability and most of the time he was happy, even if every day life as a blind man was not easy, but whenever he was in an emotional crisis the whole burden of his blindness came crushing down on him and made him vulnerable and he felt lost and lonely.

After breakfast he decided to go for a walk. He assumed that he had dark circles around his eyes after a sleepless night and so he opted for a pair of sun glasses, too. _What a cliché!_ He thought. The public park was not far away from his apartment and so he grabbed his white folding cane, his brown leather jacket, slung his messenger bag across his chest and left. He walked through the park listening to children playing, he heard the birds chirp on the trees above him and he enjoyed the warm sunshine on his face. After a while he stopped. He wanted to sit down and started searching for a bench. Finally he found one. He folded his cane, put it on the bench next to him, closed his eyes and tried to relax whilst listening to the sounds around him.

After a few minutes he noticed that someone took a seat next to him. Obviously it was a woman because he could smell a faint scent of perfume. „It is a beautiful day, isn´t it? The sun is so bright and the leaves are still green although we are already in October." She said. Auggie turned his head towards the sound of the voice and replied „Yes, it is a beautiful day. I enjoy the sunshine, too." Do you live close-by?" The woman asked „Yes, about a block away" Auggie replied. „I moved here some days ago. Still have not got any friends here." She continued. „Making new friends is not so easy, I know that." Auggie answered. The woman had a nice voice but something in the way she spoke told him that she was hiding something. There was a touch of sadness in her tone. Auggie wondered what her secret was. Being blind, voices were more important to him and he often heard things that escaped other people´s notice because sighted people usually got distracted by other things.

A few moments of silence later the woman said. I did not want to move here. I was forced by the circumstances. My doctor recommended me to move because there is a rehab centre for the blind not far away from here. But I haven´t had the courage to go there yet. It scares me to see what my future will be like. Then she paused and the tone of her voice changed. With a sigh she added „I am gradually losing my sight and I am scared to live in eternal darkness one day". And then Auggie noticed that she was on the verge of tears. „I don´t know why I am telling you all that?" She suddenly sobbed and rummaged through her handbag searching for a hanky. Auggie had listened carefully and he searched for the woman´s hand and said „Maybe it is because I am blind, too." Suddenly the woman stopped crying and between two sobs she asked „Are you kidding?" Auggie smiled and said „No, I am actually blind. I used to be sighted, but then, seven years ago, I had an accident that took my sight." And then he grabbed the cane next to him, waved a bit and said „Or what do think this is?". The young lady blew her nose, put her hanky back into her purse and said „ I did not realize you´re blind. And by the way, you seem to be so self-confident, so calm. How do you do that?" Indeed the lady had been so immersed into her own thoughts, that she did not realize that Auggie did not directly look at her. In addition, the sunglasses that Auggie wore made it difficult to determine where he directed his eyes. „I have adapted to being blind." Auggie replied and he added „You will surely be able to adapt, too when you lose your sight. It takes some time, but it is possible to live a fulfilling life despite vision loss". When he had finished his sentence, Auggie could not believe what he had just said. Two hours ago he had been sad and depressed himself and now he was giving someone a pep talk who was about to despair.

The young lady had listened to Auggie quietly and she finally said „Thanks a lot, this is exactly what I needed to hear. My eyesight is slowly fading. I got tunnel vision already and in a few months, at the latest in a year, I will be entirely blind. I have never met a blind person before but the way you talked to me makes me believe that even I can make it when I am going completely blind."

„That is very kind of you." Auggie said and then he continued „But it is not always as easy as it seems. Even for me, there are days, when the darkness around me makes me sad and depressed. To be honest today was one of these days." The woman turned towards Auggie and said „By the way, my name is Marissa". „Auggie" he replied and extended his hand. And then Auggie reached into his messenger bag and searched for a card. He gave the card to Marissa. It included his address, his phone number etc. in Braille and in print. „If you need a friend or an advice just let me know." Auggie said and then he got up, and walked away sweeping his cane back and forth to clear the way.

Marissa and Auggie had talked several times on the phone over the last weeks. She appreciated his advice and he was glad to be able to help. One afternoon when Auggie had just returned home his cell phone rang again. „Hey Auggie" sounded the voice of Marissa through the phone. „Hi Marissa, how are you doing?" Auggie replied. „I was just wondering whether you could give me a few lessons in Braille." Marissa continued. „Well, of course I am not a teacher, but yeah...I could teach you how to read with your hands" Auggie said. „That is great" Marissa smiled „What about tonight?" „Why not, is 8:00 pm okay with you? Just give me your address and I will be there" „ I am looking forward to your visit, the address is 27 Bakery Road, second floor, third door on the right" Marissa said.

Three hours later Auggie stood on Marissa´s doorstep and knocked. She opened the door and if Auggie had been sighted, he would have noticed, that her gait had become unsteady due to her slowly decreasing vision. „Come in" she said and offered him her arm to guide him to her couch. Auggie took her lead whilst sweeping slowly and in a small arc his cane back and forth. He felt for the seat, folded his cane and unpacked his messenger bag, in which he had stowed the Braille book.

„Sit down" he said and patted on the seat to his right. Marissa took a seat next to him and Auggie slowly searched for her hand and guided it to the first page with the Braille alphabet. „These are the first letters." he said „The Braille system consists of six dots, similar to those, you can find on a dice." Marissa started to slide her right index finger across the page and said „Oh my God, this is hard. How is it possible to distinguish those dots?" „No reason to despair." Auggie answered. „It took me half a year until my fingertips were sensitive enough to read the dots properly. Give yourself some time and you will see that it works. I am going to leave the book here until you have your own so that you can practice and if you have questions you can ask me. I assume that your sight has continued to decrease, right? So I recommend to start with Braille now. It will come in handy, when you have lost your sight completely. I went blind from one day to the other and had no chance to prepare myself." „Thanks a lot Auggie" Marissa said and hugged him. Auggie reciprocated the embrace before he said „You know how to find me if you need further advice or just someone to talk to."

A week later, on a Saturday morning Auggie´s cell phone rang again. He felt for the phone on the nightstand, grabbed it and tapped on the screen twice „Hello" he said with a sleepy voice and then he heard the voice of Marissa on the other end of the line. She seemed to be freaking out completely. „Auggie, Auggie, I need your help, I cannot see anymore, I am scared...PLEASE HELP ME! "Now Auggie was suddenly wide awake. He sat up in his bed and said „Calm down Marissa, I will be with you in twenty minutes." Auggie got dressed in a hurry and even renounced to his morning coffee. He shaved quickly, took his cane and his messenger bag and called a taxi. Exactly 20 minutes later he arrived at Marissas apartment. When she opened the door for him, he heard that she had been crying. Her voice sounded hoarse and he could sense that her steps were tentative and unsteady. „Oh Auggie I am so scared" she sobbed „How will I be able to live like that for the rest of my life?" Auggie pulled her into a warm embrace and whispered „It´s okay, it´s okay, I am here now."

They both sat down on the couch and Auggie tried to calm her by holding her hand. After a while he said. „I know from experience how you feel now. But it is important now to act. First of all we will get you a cane at the Lighthouse for the Blind and then you will make an appointment at the rehab centre to attend class in Braille, O & M and daily living skills. In a while you will get a great part of your former independence back. But you need time and above all... patience." „Thanks Auggie, I don´t know what I would do without you." Marissa said and blew her nose with a hanky from her pocket.

„Then let´s go" Auggie said and rose from his seat. He unfolded his cane, tapped it on the floor to lock the parts properly and offered Marissa his lead. He called a taxi and both left the house.

Marissa was scared. She had never been out completely blind although her vision had been very bad during the last few days. She had retreated to her apartment unable to move or to talk to other people. When she took Auggie´s arm to get into the taxi, she trembled with fear. „The blind leading the blind" she quipped with a faint smile and Auggie found the door with his cane, took her hand and helped her to get in before he took a seat next to her in the back of the taxi. During the ride Auggie held her hand and noticed it was cold and sweaty.

At the Lighthouse Auggie helped Marissa to find the right cane and showed her the first moves with the cane. To her, it felt strange and she was ashamed, too. He slowly took Marrisa´s hand and showed her how to hold the cane properly. Marissa listened to Auggie and tried to follow his instructions but then all of a sudden she started to cry again. „Auggie, I can´t do this, I just can´t do it. This darkness around me is so terrible. Please let us go back home". Auggie felt for her hand, took her cane, folded it neatly and put it into his messenger bag. Then he took her hand placed it onto his left elbow and said „I am gonna call a taxi now and then I will take you home with me. I don´t want you to be alone today. Is that okay with you?" „Yes, it is" Marissa sobbed. „I would not have dared asking you to do that for me but I appreciate your help so much". „Okay, then let´s go" Auggie said and took his cell phone out of his messenger bag „Call taxi" he said and the phone announced „calling taxi" Five minutes later both sat in the back of a taxi on their way to Auggie´s apartment.

When they arrived, Auggie took his cane, unfolded it and helped Marissa to get out of the car. Then he placed her hand again on his elbow and led her to the entrance of the building. Marissa was still trembling walking into the dark nothingness before her was scary to her. When they reached Auggie´s door, he slid it open and led Marissa to the couch. Then he folded his cane, put it on the credenza an went to make some coffee. After a minute the scent of fresh coffee filled the room. Marissa had remained quiet, listening to Auggie in the kitchen. Now Auggie said. „You will have to learn a lot more than just the use of the cane and I think you might start right now. Follow the sound of my voice and come over to me. I want to show you something." „But I don´t know where you are and I don´t know what the room looks like. I am afraid I´m gonna fall." „You will not fall, nothing will happen to you." Auggie said „Don´t be afraid, just get up from the couch and walk with your right hand slightly extended. My voice will tell you where I am." Marissa got up slowly and walked towards the sound of Auggie´s voice. When she reached him Auggie extended his right hand and said „Bravo, well done. Now I will show you how you can pour yourself some coffee without spilling it."


	10. Chapter 10

Starting from scratch part 10

Marissa had slept on Auggie´s couch. She had been so tired, that she had fallen asleep as soon as her head touched the pillow. When she woke up, she was disoriented. She heard Auggie bustling in the kitchen, preparing breakfast and tried to find out where she was. But then it dawned on her. Auggie had taken her home and now she was in his loft, on his couch and he was obviously in the kitchen. She could smell the scent of fresh coffee and toast. Slowly she sat up and felt for her shoes with her toes. Auggie had heard her move and called „Hey, are you up? How was your night?"

„I slept like a baby but I had nightmares. It was like I was running through a maze of dark corridors and out of the dark thousands of hands were trying to grab my. I was very scared because I could not see". Auggie slowly made his way over to the couch, felt for the spot where Marissa was sitting and took a seat next to her. „That is understandable. And to be honest, that is what happened to me, too when I lost my sight. I did not tell anybody, at least not my friends or my family. Only the instructors at the rehab facility knew what was going on with me. It will take some time to adapt to a life without vision. But you will make it, I am sure."

Twenty-five minutes later Auggie was dressed and had just chosen his tie when the doorbell rang. He opened the door and recognized the voice of Annie. „Hey Walker, what are you doing here?" He asked. Annie looked around and saw Marissa sitting at the kitchen counter, drinking coffee. „Is this your new girl friend?" She asked , and Auggie noticed that there was something in her voice that made him believe she was jealous. „Come on in" Auggie said opening the door a bit wider to let her pass. „I will be ready in a minute. I guess you wanted to give me a ride to Langley, right?" And then he disappeared into his bedroom to collect his jacket, grabbed his cane from the credenza and took Annie´s arm. „I´ll be back around 5" he said, turning a bit into the direction where Marissa was still sitting. „See you then" she answered and took another sip of her coffee. „You sound like an old married couple," Annie said with an ironic untertone. Auggie frowned but did not reply.

„Who is she?" Annie asked when they were on their way to Langley. „Well, this is a long story" Auggie replied. „We met a few months ago in the park and we seemed to have a connection. A connection, that goes beyond the fact that she is blind, too. When we met, she was still sighted but had already signs of severe vision loss. I offered her my help and that´s it." „That is it, really?" Annie asked in an incredulous tone. „Why should I lie to you"? Auggie asked. He was about to get annoyed. He definitely did not like Annie´s tone. And in addition, she was with Ryan, she had dumped him so to speak and now she had no right whatsoever to be jealous.

Annie realized that she had gone too far by trying to interrogate her friend and therefore she said. „Okay we´d better change the subject I suppose!" „I´d really appreciate that". Auggie answered and started fumbling with his folded cane. He usually did that when he was nervous or a bit insecure. Arriving in Langley, Auggie got out of the car, unfolded his cane and walked right next to Annie sweeping the cane back and forth in an arc. He did not take Annie´s arm and she realized that he was still angry with her.

Auggie was sitting at his desk, he had his headphones on and was trying to type a letter. But he could not concentrate because he was distracted. Not distracted by people coming constantly into his office as usual, but by his own thoughts. He thought of Marissa and about what she was going through. To think of her, meant to think of what he had gone through when he had lost his sight. He had tried to forget how he had felt right after his accident when he noticed that he was blind but from time to time he was haunted by flashbacks of his past that took him back to Tikrit, back to his unit, back to the day when „IT" happened and back to the time at the rehab centre where he fought a hard fight against himself, his pride and the circumstances, in order to regain his independence.

Being with Marissa meant to go back to the days when his life was difficult and nothing but a dark tunnel with no light at the end. More than once he had thought about putting an and to a life in eternal darkness. One day he had even dropped his cane and had started running right into traffic. But some drivers had excellent reflexes and he had survived.

Auggie thought. _Am I strong enough to help Marissa or will I break down, because my own feelings make me vulnerable ? Because the demons of my own past come back to me? _

He remembered those sleepless nights right after the accident when he had cried himself to sleep like a baby. Crying had never been an option for him and the need to cry made him even more angry. The soldier Captain Anderson was a strong man who never gave up, who almost never failed on a mission and who never allowed personal feelings that could distract him from his goal. But this soldier Anderson did not exist anymore. He had died so to speak in that explosion in Tikrit and all that was left was a wounded civilian, trying to get his life under control again. Auggie tried to shake off these dark thoughts and continued typing. Soon it was noon and he needed a break, but before he wanted to finish his letter.

Annie sat at her desk searching the internet for information that could be useful for her next mission but in her mind she was still at Auggie´s apartment. What was this woman doing there and why had Auggie been so furious this morning? He usually enjoyed her company and liked the physical contact with her when he took her lead. But this morning, he had been so distant, even angry. Annie was askig herself what was going on with him. She did not like the idea that Auggie might have found a new girl friend. There had been a couple of women in the past years and lately he had been with Hayley and Natasha. Annie was confused. She was with Ryan so why should it bother her if her best friend had a new relationship? I`d better get back to work she said to herself when she suddenly heard someone clear his throat right behind her. „Hey Walker, already on a break or are you running out of ideas for your mission?" It was Auggie who stood behind her. „I could use a short break and above all some strong coffee. Do you want to join me?" He asked.

Now Annie was even more confused than before. Auggie smiled at her and nothing reminded her of the furious guy a few hours ago. She hesitated a bit, thinking about a response but then she said. „Yeah, I would love to have some coffee, too". And then she added „Would you like to take my arm?" Auggie nodded and she bumped her hand with the back of his hand to offer him her lead. They both walked in silence until they arrived at the cafeteria. Annie scanned the room for a free table and put Auggie´s hand on the back of a chair. He took a seat and Annie disappeared to get the coffee. About a minute later she was back with two mugs of hot Caffé Latte.

Coffee at your 11 o´clock she said and Auggie sneaked his hand across the table to find his cup. After the first sip of coffee Annie said „I have to apologize Auggie. I am sorry. I should not have been so curious this morning. I have no right to question you about your relationships."

Auggie turned his head, trying to meet her gaze and said „It´s okay, we´re good. I was in a bad mood today."

Four hours later Auggie was back home. Marissa had slept on his couch all day long. The lack of light perception made her tired and given her lack of sight, she had not so many options to distract herself. „Hey Auggie" She said with a sleepy voice when she heard Auggie enter his loft. „Hey Marissa, what have you been up to all day?" He asked and walked over to the couch folding his cane on his way to her. „I have not done a lot. I was so tired, that I spent almost the whole day on your couch" Marissa replied.

Again Auggie was reminded of his first days and weeks as a blind man. He also had spent many hours sleeping or just napping on his bed. But when he had started working on his Braille and cane skills the tiredness had disappeared because he needed all his concentration to move on with his life.

„You need to distract yourself a bit to get rid of that tiredness. The lack of light makes you feel tired but as soon as you have something to do ,you will forget about being tired." Auggie said and walked towards the kitchen to open the fridge. And then he added „Why don´t you just continue with your Braille studies? The book is on the credenza. In a week you will start going to blindschool and then there will be no time for long naps anymore, that´s for sure." Auggie had taken a couple of eggs out of his fridge, got some milk and flour from the cupboard and started making pancakes. Within a few minutes the room smelled of pancakes and cinnamon. Marissa had listened to Auggie´s activities in the kitchen and said „ I cannot believe that you are able to do all of that without seeing. I feel so useless and insecure. I am scared I will not make it as a blind person."

Auggie had made a couple of pancakes with cinnamon on top and was now laying the table. He took two plates from the board above the kitchen counter, got some cutlery from the drawer and put a glass of mineral water next to every plate. When he was done he said „For me it was also hard to re-learn all the things that seemed so easy when I was still sighted, but I am glad that I did not give up. You will also get to the point, where living as a blind person gets easier, but you need time, patience and you must be willing to work hard." Marissa slowly walked over to the kitchen counter where Auggie had prepared everything, felt for the chair and took a seat next to Auggie. Using fork and knife blind was difficult and so she rolled the pancake and ate it with her hands. Auggie had guessed that because he could not hear the sound of cutlery being used and so he said „You don´t need to eat with your hands only because you cannot see. It requires some practice ,but you might use fork and knife like everybody else."

If somebody else had said that, Marissa would have felt offended, but Auggie was a special case. She appreciated him as a friend and that made it easier for her to accept his advice. And when she was still sighted she had had the chance to watch him and to realize how capable he was at everything that he did despite his lack of sight. He was the example that she needed to move forward with her life.


	11. Chapter 11

Starting from scratch part 11

Marissa had spent three days with Auggie in his flat. During these days he had shown her some basic things that she would need to get around as a blind person. He had shown her how to pour hot and cold drinks, he had given her a few Braille lessons and he had given her some tips about how to get around a kitchen without burning or cutting herself. Now she was back in her own flat and the following day would be her first day at blindschool. Marissa sighed, she was not sure that she would be able to learn all the things that she needed to live independently as a blind woman.

Auggie prepared himself for a new day in Langley. He stood in the bathroom in front of the mirror and shaved. It was not like he could see his own face in the mirror, but it was an old habit and of course it was more convenient. In his mind he went back to the days he had spent with Marissa. He missed her and he could not believe that he did so. He had spent a lot of time alone since he had gone blind and therefore it was strange how quickly he had adapted to living with someone. Auggie had finished shaving and made his way back to the bed where he grabbed his shirt, his trousers and his tie. Since he had lost his vision the selection of clothes had become a special issue. Now he preferred black, grey and dark-blue instead of the sometimes colourful shirts and T-shirts in red, green or white that he had worn before. The selection of clothes that he had now, made it easier for him to dress himself fashionably and neatly. He did not have to worry about being dressed like a clown for Carnival.

Auggie made his way to the kitchen, took a last sip of coffee and grabbed his cane and his messenger bag. Outside, he already heard the honking horn of his car service that would take him to Langley. He used his cane to find the car, trailed his hand along the side of the car and finally found the door. He took a seat in the back and was quickly lost in thought. He wondered what Marissa was up to and at the same time he thought of Annie. These thoughts that he could not ban from spinning around in his mind confused him. Why couldn´t he stop to think of Annie well knowing that she was with Ryan and why did he think of Marissa so often? After all Marissa was only a good friend who needed his help. Annie, however, was his former lover and he could not deny that he still had feelings for her.

Arriving in Langley, Auggie got out of the car and walked towards the entrance whilst sweeping his white cane back and forth. And again he thought of Marissa when he remembered how he had come back with his cane in his hand on his first day as a blind man in Langley. His first encounter had been a column. He had directly walked against it and he had hurt his shin. Joan Campbell had planned to welcome him at the door but before she could get to him, she saw him walking towards that column. It had been gut-wrenching for her to see one of her best operatives so helpless. When she had finally met him, to take him to his new Tech Ops office she had been glad that Auggie could not see her, because the tears of pity and shock in her eyes were clearly visible. Joan had the reputation to be always cool and to keep her feelings well under control. But when it came to Auggie, she felt like a mother who wanted to protect her child from harm. She had always liked him and a couple of times they had gone to the field together when he was still sighted. She knew so well about his capabilities. But now, that Auggie was blind she felt even more the need to protect him. And if she was honest, there was some sort of guilt, too. She felt a bit guilty, because she had not been able to persuade Auggie to stay, when he had requested to leave Langley and to serve in the Special Forces Unit in Iraq. If she had not given her permission, he would not be blind now, at least that was how she thought.

Auggie had taken a seat at his desk and was booting his computer when Barber came in. „Hey buddy, how is it going?" He asked and grinned while he was munching on a donut. Auggie turned his head towards him and replied „I am fine but I have a lot of things on my schedule for today." „Would you like to go for a beer after work?" Barber asked and Auggie smiled „Hey, what a stupid question and to use the words of a certain operative I AM IN". Barber was not only a colleague for Auggie, he had also become a true friend to rely on whenever Auggie needed help. He had been by his side when Annie was in a coma, he had helped him to deal with the whole Henry story and he had encouraged Auggie to start a relationship with Annie when he realized that there was some chemistry between Auggie and Annie. Barber and Auggie had met when Auggie had already lost his sight and Barber´s admiration for Auggie and his capabilities had turned into friendship after a while.

Auggie grabbed the folder from his desk and slid his hands across the Braille label. Joan had given him the latest information about the mission that was planned next. Auggie´s fingers flew across the page, reading the content until he had all the details that he needed. If somebody had told him when he was recently blinded that he would read so easily with his hands one day, he would not have believed it. He wouldn´t have believed either that it was possible to adapt to living in eternal darkness but he had managed to give his life a new direction even without being able to see.

Auggie touched the glass lid of his watch, flipped it open and felt for the time. It was around noon again and he needed something to eat and a coffee. He grabbed his cane from the top drawer of his desk, unfolded it and left the office. He had decided to use his white cane a bit more often than the laser. Around the office the laser came in handy but in the course of time he had noticed that outside the office and in the halls of Langley he was more confident when he used the white folding cane. Auggie reached the cafeteria and waited for his turn. „A coffee with milk and a cheese sandwich please" he said when the young waitress asked him for his wishes. „Would you mind finding a table for me?" He added and the young waitress took the tray and Auggie followed her by listening to the sound of her heels when she walked. „Thank you" he smiled, folded his cane, felt for the back of the chair and took a seat. He had already finished the first half of his cheese sandwich when a familiar voice called him „Hey Auggie how are you doing today?" It was Annie. „May I take a seat?" She added and Auggie´s eyebrows shot up in surprise „Since when do you ask?" He replied. Annie hesitated a bit and then she said „Well...we have had some problems recently so maybe you are not comfortable with me keeping you company" „What a nonsense" Auggie said. You are my closest friend so why should I mind your keeping me company" And then he sneaked his hand across the table to find Annie´s hand and squeezed it a bit before he continued eating his sandwich. Annie sipped on her coffee and watched her best blind friend while he enjoyed the rest of his sandwich.

Marissa had her first mobility and orientation lesson. She was scared. She stood on the sidewalk and listened to the instructions of the mobility trainer. Walking straight ahead into the black nothingness before her was weird and scary. The sound of cars, the steps of people walking by, the honking horns of cars and the sirens of an ambulance were so overwhelming, that she could barely concentrate on what she was supposed to do. The mobility trainer walked next to her and gave her instructions about how to use the cane properly showing her the perfect grip. When they finally reached a traffic light he said „Extend your cane a bit and feel for the curb" Marissa did as she was told and found the curb with the tip of her cane. „Now listen to the beeping sound" The trainer said and then he added „As long as you can hear the beeping, the lights are green. When it stops, the lights are red again" Marissa finally heard the beeping and crossed the street whilst her instructor walked right behind her. When she reached the other sidewalk, she was trembling and sweating. „Will I ever get used to this?" She said and waved her hands before her eyes. „You surely will" the instructor said and squeezed her arm for a bit of reassurance.

After the break at the cafeteria Auggie returned to his office. There were still lots of things to do for him and he wanted to get everything done by the end of the day and before he went for a drink with Barber at the tavern. When he started his e-mail programme he noticed that he had lots of new messages. He scrolled through the mail box and all of a sudden he was startled. He opened the last message and listened to the voice reading the content to him.

**Dear Auggie,**

**I know this must be a surprise, even a huge shock for you to read this message, and honestly I don´t know how to explain all that in a few lines to you. All I want you to know, is that I am alive and recovering from the events of the past few months. If you want to get in touch with me, please send me a reply to thise-mail. I will be able to give you more details when we meet.**

**Regards your friend**

**Tony**

When the computer voice had read the last words of the message to Auggie, he was startled. His heart was racing and his hands were trembling. How was it possible that Tony was still alive? He had talked to the medical examiner at the hospital, the man had confirmed Tony´s death and now all of a sudden he was told that his friend was still alive. Of course, things like this could happen in the life of a spy. Annie had gone dark and Helen, too but this was scary. At first Auggie thought that the message was a bad joke and that somebody wanted to play tricks on him. If so, it was a very bad and macabre trick. Auggie mused. How could he find out if the message was really from Tony? He had to check on that. Too many bad things had happened to him lately and he did not want to get into danger again.

Two hours later Barber entered Auggie´s office. Auggie was still busy with his research to find out what had happened to Tony. He was so immersed into his work and had his headphones on, that he did not realize Barber´s presence „Hey man" Barber said and then he noticed that something was wrong „What happened, you look strange" He said.

Auggie tilted his head, slid down his headphones and turned his chair into Barber´s direction. For a second he contemplated the idea not to tell Barber what had happened. But then he decided to talk to him. Barber was his friend and he trusted him enough to read him in.

„I got a message from Tony" Auggie said. Barber gave him an incredulous look and stammered. From Tony...I...I...I mean from Tony...the Tony who died recently by alcohol abuse? How is that?"

„I don´t know either." Auggie replied „I have to find out whether this message is really from him or just a fake, a bad joke." He explained. But I am gonna leave that for later. I need some distraction and I think a cold beer at Allan´s is just the right way to relax a bit.

„All right" Barber said and Auggie shut down his computer before he fished his cane out of the top desk drawer and took Barber´s arm. Twenty minutes later both guys were sitting at a table at Allan´s drinking beer. „So what´s up?" Barber asked. „You wanted to tell me more about the e-mail you received so spill it!"


	12. Chapter 12

Starting from scratch part 12

Auggie and Barber had spent almost three hours at the pub and had talked about different things but most of the time they had made assumptions about what had happened to Tony and how it could have been possible that he was still alive. At 1:00 a.m. Barber had taken Auggie home and had accompanied him to his flat. Auggie usually went home alone, but that night he was a bit tipsy and walking with a cane with a certain amount of alcohol in his bloodstream was not easy. So he had appreciated the help of his friend and colleague.

The next morning Auggie woke up with a headache. Too much Tequila and beer. He got up and went straight away into the bathroom and opened the door of his mirror cabinet to find some Aspirins. He slid his fingertips across the labels until he had found the right package and with a mouthful of water from the faucet he swallowed the pill. Soon the e-mail from Tony came back to his mind and he decided to find out what had happened. To solve that mystery would be his top priority today, no matter how much time it would take. Auggie took a shower, got dressed and left. He didn´t even take his time for a coffee since he was too impatient and curious to find out about Tony´s supposedly faked death.

No matter what Tony would tell him, he would find out about his place. Auggie opened his e-mail programme and started to type a message.

**Dear Tony**

**thank you for your message which came as a total surprise...**

But then he had second thoughts. What if all of that was a trap and if he was lured into danger? After Henry and the Belenko story anything was possible. So Auggie quickly deleted the message and continued his investigations.

After two hours and a half in Langley Auggie had a trace that he could follow. He had hacked into the e-mail account from where Tony had sent the message and had found out from wich server it had been forwarded. It was from Texas and when he hacked the e-mail account, he noticed that the name of the account holder was not Tony Delgado but James Mason. Who was this James Mason? Did James Mason pretend to be Tony? How did he know about him? All that and a lot more was now spinning round in Auggie´s head. His spy instinct told him to be extremely cautious when he proceeded with his investigations. Auggie had got a lot further with his search for Tony but from now on he needed help. Being blind was often a hindrance for him and he hated it to depend on other people´s help but he had no choice. He could not continue alone instead he had to read in one of his colleagues. So he called Barber and asked him for assistance. Barber was chewing on a piece of Pizza when he entered Auggie´s office. „Tuna and onion, right?" Auggie said when Barber came in and the pizza scent filled the office. „You got it buddy" Barber replied and took a seat on the chair next to Auggie.

„So what have you found out" He asked swallowing his last bite of pizza and wiping his mouth and his fingers with a Kleenex from his pocket. „You and Hollman need to go to Texas". Auggie said. „Wow, what are we going to do there?" Barber asked. „ I want you to follow a guy named James Mason. Tony´s e-mail came from his account. I want to know who that guy is and what he is up to" Barber had listened and said „That sounds pretty exciting. I am your man Auggie. When do we start?" „Tomorrow morning." Auggie replied and then he added „A CIA asset in Houston will provide you with a van and with all the necessary surveillance equipment. Your flight is due on 11:30 am.

Barber was excited. Unexpected events and special missions were his favourite task. He was looking forward to his Texas trip with Hollman.

Barber and Hollman arrived in Texas. The plane had been punctual, no delays so far. The two men made their way to baggage claim, collected their trolley suitcases and went to the exit. Auggie had told them to look for a blue Mercedes. The code word was „Sunflowerseeds". Barber and Hollman walked towards the car. The driver saw them, got out and Hollman asked. „Do you know where to buy sunflowerseeds?" The man smiled and said „Get in and follow me" Barber and Hollman got into the back of the blue Mercedes and seconds later they were on their way to a safe house.

Half an hour later Gary, the driver stopped in front of a huge building with 30 floors. He handed over the keys and said. „Apartment 333, third floor. There is an encrypted phone on the kitchen table. Fridge is stocked up for your daily needs. The surveillance van will be waiting for you in front of the building tomorrow at 8:00 a.m. and the keys will be in your letter box. Good Luck! And if you should need anything, just call me. My name is Gary and my number is 567 568" „Thanks" Barber said and repeated „567 568".

Barber was just preparing eggs with bacon when the encrypted phone rang. It was Auggie „Hey buddy, how is it going?" he enquired. „Everything alright so far" Barber said and added some salt to the eggs in the frying pan. He was always hungry and right after Pizza eggs with bacon were his favourite dish. „We will get the van tomorrow at 8:00 and then we will start with the surveillance of the guy" „Good" Auggie said and added „Good luck" before he ended the call.

The next morning at 8:30 Hollman and Barber were on their way to James Mason. The van was inconspicuous. It had the appearance of a plumber service car. Ten minutes after their arrival Barber saw a man leaving the house where James supposedly lived. The man was tall, had broad shoulders, blond hair and wore eye glasses. He walked to the garage, got into a black SUV and drove away.

With a small camera Barber had taken a photo of the man and compared it to a photo of Tony. There was no resemblence whatsoever. He was tall and only the posture and the way he walked reminded a bit of Tony. Barber and Hollman followed the car. After 10 minutes the blond man in the SUV stopped in front of a Hotel, he left his car on the parking lot and went in.

Auggie was nervous. He wanted to find out what happened to Tony as soon as possible. He prayed that the mission of Barber and Hollman was a success. He hated the idea to be stuck in his office or his apartment because of his blindness. He needed to collect his thoughts and so Marissa´s invitation for dinner was a welcome opportunity to distract himself a bit.

Around 8:00 p.m. Auggie knocked on Marissas door. He was casually dressed with black jeans, a white shirt and a brown leather jacket. His hands rested on top of his cane when he heard Marissa open the door. „Hey Auggie, nice to see you" she said and smiled a bit. Auggie set his cane in motion and made his way over to the couch. He had been at Marissa´s often enough to know his way around. Auggie folded his cane and put it into his messeger bag. „Smells fantastic here" he said. „Steak, green beans and baked potatoes" Marissa said. „You are on the right way, you are making progress" Auggie remarked.

„I remember a certain girl that was not able to pour herself a cup of coffee without help" he quipped Marissa nudged him and said „That is water under the bridge. I am grateful that you did not give up insisting on me going to blindschool. Without you, and your support, I would probably still be sitting on my couch feeling sorry for myself". „I can be pretty persuasive." Auggie smiled and squeezed Marissa´s hand. Touch was important for him. He couldn´t see the other people´s eyes to get in contact. So touch was the only option to establish contact with the person he was talking to.

Dinner was delicious. Marissa was a fantastic cook and a glass of red Bordeaux wine made the dinner a gourmet´s delight.


	13. Chapter 13

Starting from scratch part 13

Barber and Hollman had found out that James Mason worked in a hotel. Hollman and Tony had never met. So just in case, there was a connection between James and Tony, it was more inconspicuous to have Hollman check the hotel. They left the surveillance van on the parking lot of the Hotel and Hollman went in, pretending to be someone who had a business date at the hotel.

Dressed in an elegant grey suit with a red silk-tie and with a briefcase in his right hand, he went to the hotel bar to order a drink. He was not too surprised, when he realized, that the bar tender was James Mason. Hollman ordered a double Espresso and pretended to read some documents . When he saw that James returned with the Espresso he pressed the button of the voice recorder on his phone to record the conversation and put the filer over the phone to hide it. „Sir, your Espresso. Is there anything else I can do for you?" James Mason´s voice was deep and his accent made clear, that he was not from Texas. „No thank you, that is all for now" Hollman replied and sipped on this Espresso.

About an hour later Hollman returned to the van where Barber had been waiting for him. Eric was eating potato chips when Hollman slid the door of the van open.

„What did you find out?" Barber asked. „Hollman took his mobile phone and opened the voice recorder. „James Mason is the bar tender at the hotel. I recorded his voice when he brought my Espresso. He is not from Texas, that´s for sure. My guess is, he is from California." Tony was from California, too Eric said and froze when Hollman started his voice recorder to have him listen to the conversation. „That is Tony´s voice" Barber said and a cold shiver went down his spine. „Are you sure?" Hollman asked. „Yeah, 100%" Barber replied and continued „We have to call Auggie now!"

Barber had converted the brief conversation into an MP3 file and had sent it to Auggie attached to an e-mail.

**Dear Auggie,**

**attached you will find a file with a brief conversation recording. Please listen to the recording and tell me what you think.**

**Regards**

**Eric**

It was 11:30 am when Auggie received Barber´s message. He opened his e-mail account and started to download the MP3 file. When he listened to the recording, he went pale and his heart started racing like a hammer. _That was the voice of Tony!_

Immediately Auggie took his cell phone and said „call Eric Barber"

_Dialling Eric Barber _the phone announced and seconds later Auggie heard Eric´s voice. „Hey buddy did you hear what I heard?" he asked. „It is Tony" was all Auggie could say, before he ended the call and sank into his desk chair.

Auggie was confused and shocked. One of his best friends was still alive. Tony Delgado was James Mason and vice versa. But why did he fake his own death? Auggie needed an explanation. He shut down his computer, took his phone and called the airport to book a flight. He had to go to Texas. He could not wait any longer for Hollman and Barber to come back to him with results.

Auggie called a taxi and went home. In a hurry, he packed a bag with enough clothes for a week, added his spare cane and some toiletries before he left and locked the door behind him. The taxi to the airport was already waiting for him, when he left the house sweeping his cane back and forth. „Can I help you Sir?" The taxi driver asked and opened the door for Auggie. Auggie found the open door with his cane and handed his bag over to the driver who put it into the trunk of the car.

At the airport a young flight attended accompanied Auggie to the check-in counter. Auggie showed his ticket and his identity card and after he had been checked in by the security staff he took again the elbow of the flight attended who guided him to the plane. Auggie hated airports. He always felt so lost and helpless there. Baggage claim and blindness did not fit together. It had already been difficult for him to find his suitcase when he had been sighted, but now, as a blind man, things had gotten more complicated for him. He also did not like the crowds at an international airport. The noises and sounds were so overwhelming that he often had problems to concentrate on the flights that were announced and he could not read the numbers of the flights on the information board anymore.

Auggie had slept during the flight. He was exhausted because of everything that had happened in the last couple of days. He could not stop his mind from spinning. The last two nights had been almost sleepless. A young flight attendant woke him „Sir, you need to fasten your seatbelt we are about to land" She said and Auggie felt for the seatbelt. Twenty-five minutes later he was in a taxi and on his way to Greenstone-Road where the safe house of Barber and Hollman was. He had no keys but lock-picking was something that he could also do blind. Auggie asked the taxi driver to take him to the apartment when they arrived and the young man offered Auggie his arm to guide him. As soon as the young man was out of reach and Auggie could not hear his steps anymore, he knocked. Obviously Barber and Hollman were still away and so he picked the lock and entered.

Auggie cautiously swept his cane from the left to the right to orient himself whilst trailing his little bag on wheels behind with the other hand. When he had closed the door, he left his bag next to the entrance and started to explore the rooms. Sweeping his cane with his right and extending his left hand for further orientation, Auggie walked slowly around the room. He veered a bit to his left and found a kitchenette and a kitchen counter with two chairs. He slowly made his way across the room and discovered a couch with a glass table in front of it, a TV set on the opposite wall and a huge armchair. He trailed his hand along the wall and found a door that led to the bedroom. The bedroom contained a huge double bed and a closet. The bathroom was accessible through a door from the bedroom and through a second one in the living room.

After he had counted the steps and made himself familiar with the entire space, Auggie took his bag and started to unpack. He needed a shower and if possible some coffee. He wondered whether he could find everything that he needed quickly enough. With his right hand slightly outstretched Auggie oriented himself in the bathroom. Next to the wash basin he found a shelf with towels and took one. Ten minutes later he was done. The shower had done him good and Auggie dried himself with the towel from the shelf and got dressed again. He slowly walked to the kitchenette and started his search for coffee. Auggie trailed his hand along the kitchen counter and touched the surface. He found the coffeemaker and when he reached up his hands touched two cupboards. He opened the first door and felt around. There were cups and plates and some glass bowls. The second cupboard contained food. There were some Spaghetti, rice, flour and a glass jar with a lid. Auggie opened it and smelled coffee. _Great! _He thought. He was not as helpless in a new environment as others might think. Right under the kitchen counter he discovered two drawers. In the first one there was some cutlery. He took out a spoon and started to fill some coffee into the coffeemaker when he suddenly heard the door open.

Hollman entered the room and could not believe his eyes. „Auggie what the hell are you doing here?" „Making some coffee" Auggie quipped. „Hey man, that is a surprise" That was Barber who had come into the room right after Hollman.

Auggie had found the sink, poured some water into the glass pot and started the coffeemaker. When he was ready, he turned and said „I could not just sit around and wait until you two get back to DC. I needed to see for myself what is going on here."

Over a cup of coffee Hollman and Barber told Auggie what they had found out. Auggie was still incredulous that James Mason and Tony Delgado should be the same person but then he remembered that he had been in a similar position a little more than a year ago when Annie had told him that Teresa Hamilton was his supposedly deceased wife Helen Hanson. „I need to talk to him" Auggie said.

The next day, around noon Hollman went back to the hotel. Again he took a seat at the bar and ordered some coffee. When James returned with the cup, Hollman paid his bill and gave James a card. With a puzzled look on his face James stared at the card and read.

**We need to meet.**

**Tomorrow 8:00 pm**

**Mark´s Coffeehouse**

**Glasgow Road**

**A. **

„He has found me" James said and walked away.


	14. Chapter 14

Starting from scratch part 14

It was a bit before 8:00 pm. Auggie was sitting at a table in Mark´s Coffeehouse and was sipping on a cappuccino. He was so nervous, that he had already opened the lid of his watch a couple of times to feel for the time. Barber was waiting in the surveillance van on the other side of the road and just in case he got into trouble, Hollman had taken a seat a few tables away from him and was reading a newspaper.

A man entered, and if Auggie had not been blind, he would have noticed the puzzled expression on the man´s face. „Hello Auggie" A deep voice greeted him and Auggie felt himself shiver. It was the voice of Tony Delgado but if Auggie had been sighted, he would have seen that the face belonged to James Mason. Auggie heard that Tony/James took a seat and heard him call the waitress. „A Latte Macchiato please." He said and turned to face Auggie when he added „So, you have finally found me my friend!" Auggie was still incredulous that his dead friend Tony was sitting next to him. Was there any possibility that somebody else could take Tony´s identity and have the same voice? Auggie needed to find out whether the man on the other side of the table was really Tony. The best strategy was to ask him questions that only Tony could answer, things that only he and his former army buddies knew.

„How did you find me so quickly?" Tony/James asked. „Spy craft" was Auggie´s answer. „I still cannot believe that you are alive." Auggie continued and added „But I am sure that you will understand that I have to be sure that you are really Tony."

„I can totally understand that" Tony/James said. If you could see, you would realize that I do look different now. I do not want to offend you, but given your visual disability, I think that you have not managed to find me all on your own, right? So somebody will have told you about my looks I assume."

„Yeah, you are blond and you are wearing glasses, right?" Auggie replied. Tony/James nodded and said „Yes, that is right and I will explain to you now how that happened."

And then Tony/James started to tell his story: „I was in my apartment when Belenko and his friends broke into it. They had guns and they knew about my connection with you and about my past in the Special Forces Unit in Iraq. They wanted me to give them the names of my surviving army buddies to take revenge. I refused. I did not want to jeopardize your and Dekkart´s life. They told me that I had 24 hours to change my mind and to give them the names, otherwise they would kill my family.

I love my parents and my two brothers and I did not want them to be involved into all of that. They do not even know about my job and about all the spy stuff. So I tried to think about a trick. An old friend of mine works in a hospital. His name is Grayson and he is a medical examiner. Grayson owed me a favour. I was frustrated enough about the whole situation to need a few drinks and Grayson, my friend, suggested to take excessive alcohol abuse as an explanation for my death. In the meantime, I would disappear and have plastic surgery to change my looks. Grayson has a friend in Texas who is a plastic surgeon. I had a couple of operations in a hospital in Austin to change the look of my nose and my mouth. I dyed my hair and traded my contact lenses for eye glasses. To make the whole thing perfect, I changed my name and started to work in a hotel as a bar tender. Auggie had listened and his surprise had grown with every second. „That is an incredible story." He said and then he added „I did not even know that you were wearing contact lenses."

„I am very short sighted" Tony/James said and I have not told anybody about that since I have always felt ashamed to wear glasses. But this time, my need for glasses was an advantage. It helped to change my looks. „I would be glad, if I would only need glasses to improve my sight" Auggie quipped.

„You will surely understand that I need some definitive confirmation that you are really Tony and that all of this is not a cheap trick." Auggie said and then he continued „I will now ask you a couple of questions and you will reply to me."

And then Auggie started his interrogation:

„What was Chris´favourite drink?"

„His family is British so it is Earl Grey Tea" Tony replied.

„That´s right" Auggie said

„What is the name of Billy´s sister?"

„Parker" Tony answered

„Correct" Auggie stated.

„Who was in charge of the supply and logistics battalion in Tikrit?"

„Corporal Grant and Corporal Sanders" Was Tony´s reply.

„Right" Auggie said.

„What happened when Chris, Jason and I left the camp for an unsanctioned visit to a local restaurant at night?

„General O ´Bash caught you and all of you had three extra night shifts as a guard"

„That would be the answer" Auggie grinned.

„When did the explosion happen, that took my sight?"

„That was on November 3rd 2007 in Tikrit." Tony answered quickly without thinking about it.

„Exactly" Auggie replied.

„What happened on June 1st 2007 before Billy, Chris and I joined the Special Forces Unit? „

„Chris got married to Alicia who was pregnant." Tony said.

„Yes, that´s correct." Auggie replied and then he continued „One last question"

„When and where was our last meeting?"

„That was at the café on Lincoln Square on November 23rd"

„Good" Auggie said and added „I guess that should be proof enough that you are really Tony."

„It is so good to see you again Auggie." Tony said. „I have missed you and our conversations" He added with a weary smile. „Yeah, I missed you, too" Auggie said and then he continued „You know what? I got into a fight with your friend Grayson because I could not believe you were dead. The police arrested me because I had pushed Grayson against the wall."

„You and your hot temper" Tony said and grinned a bit. „I spent a night in police custody and

Annie bailed me out." Auggie added and then he asked „What are you going to do now? Do you want to stay in Houston?" „Yes, I think so." Tony said. „I don´t want to run any risk by coming back to DC now. Even if I do look different." „I can totally understand that." Auggie answered and took the last sip of his cappuccino before he got up and unfolded his cane again, that he had kept in his messenger bag on the table. „We ´ll keep in touch." Tony said, before Auggie made his way to the door, whilst sweeping his cane back and forth. A minute after he had left, Hollman paid and followed him.

Auggie, Barber and Hollman had returned to Langley. Auggie was on his way to Joan´s office, to read her in about the latest events. „Come in" he heard Joan say when he knocked on her office door.

Auggie swept his cane and found the chair. „Take a seat" Joan offered. „What have you been up to during your 4 days of vacation?" She asked. „Well...I would not exactly call that a vacation." Auggie answered. „How so?" Joan enquired. „ I took a trip to Houston and what I discovered has not only given me a shock." Joan had gotten curious and asked „And what would that be?"

„Tony Delgado is alive!" Auggie said.

Joan´s eyes got wider and wider and she stammered. „Let me get that straight...we ...we are talking about Tony...Tony Delgado...your army buddy...the guy who died a couple of months ago because of alcohol abuse in a DC hospital, right? „ Yes, that would be the one" Auggie said and continued. „ He faked his own death because Belenko had threatened him to kill his family. Then he had plastic surgery to change his looks and moved to Texas."

„Wow, that is an incredible story" Joan said and got up from her office chair. She walked towards Auggie and when she stood next to him, she put one hand on Auggie´s shoulder and asked with concern in her voice „And how do you feel now?" Auggie turned his head in an attempt to meet Joan´s gaze, he swallowed the lump that had built up in his throat and said „I am glad that he is alive but it was also a big shock for me, when I got the whole story."

„ I can imagine that, you were very close friends" Joan stated. „Yes, we were" Auggie answered and got up from his seat. He navigated around the room with his cane and finally reached the door.

„ I need some time to digest all of that." He said, before he opened the door and left.

Joan had watched Auggie with concern. She realized that the whole story had not only impressed Auggie, it had given him a serious shock. She had rarely seen Auggie Anderson so emotionally involved into something, so vulnerable, except for the time right after his accident when he had lost his eye sight. I have to take care of him she thought. He has gone through too much lately.


	15. Chapter 15

Starting from scratch part 15

Joan was extremely worried about Auggie. The story with Tony had really shaken him and Joan felt that he was exhausted. He needed definitely a break. The months he had spent with Tash had obviously not been sufficient to relax him. Auggie was one of her best operatives and he needed her help. And now Joan had a plan.

The next day Joan entered Auggie´s office. He was working on a code, that was hard to decipher, when his boss came into the room. „We need to talk Auggie" Joan said and if Auggie Anderson had been sighted, he would have seen, the serious expression on Joan´s face. „What do you want to talk about?" Auggie asked.

„Well..." Joan cleared her throat „I have realized that the recent events have caused you some trouble and I am worried." Auggie hated to admit his vulnerability and replied „I am fine Joan, you don´t need to worry about me. Everything is okay."

Joan came a bit closer and put her hand on Auggie´s shoulder. „You are not okay" She said and then she continued „Auggie, you definitely need some time off to process everything that has happened and you will need professional assistance. You will go to a rehab centre where professional staff is at your disposal to help you coping".

The expression on Auggie´s face changed and his eyes widened. He could not believe what he had just heard. „I don´t need anybody´s assistance" he protested and before he could add something, he was cut off by Joan „Auggie this is an order! You will go to a rehab centre for 6 weeks. There, you will have the opportunity to talk to professional psychologists, you can learn new techniques for relaxation and you will have time to make new acquaintances that are not related to the CIA. Auggie... you need to get away from here for a while. For your own sake, for your own mental and physical health."

Auggie was incredulous. The last time Joan had spoken to him like that was two years ago, after the incident at the pub. She had sent him to a shrink and he had reluctantly complied. He did not like to talk about his feelings and even less with people he did not know. He hated it to admit his own vulnerabilities. And since he had gone blind about seven years ago, he often hated new places, too. Going to rehab meant a lot of new people, a new environment and many new impressions. Due to his blindness it was not so easy to get acquainted with a new space. Rehab centres tended to be huge and he would need a lot of time to get to know his surroundings. He did not want to rely on other´s. He hated the three words _I need help. _And the prospect, to get to know many new people made him also a bit insecure. He could not see their faces and had to rely on the voices he heard. He often felt uncomfortable, when he could not immediately relate the voice of a new acquaintance.

„I do not need a break" Auggie protested again but Joan cut him off again and said „You will definetly go on leave for a while. End of discussion. My decisions are final! Tomorrow at 8:00 am a car service will pick you up and take you to the rehab centre.

Auggie knew that Joan was serious when she said „ Collect your things, shut down the computer and I will take you home now. You need time to pack your suitcase." Auggie realized that he had no choice. After all Joan was his boss. He did as he was told and five minutes later he and Joan were on their way to his loft. When they arrived about 20 minutes later, he opened the door, walked to the credenza to put down his cane and his messenger bag.

Then he heard Joan rummage around his desk. „What are you doing there?" He asked and Joan answered. „ I forgot to tell you something. Your laptop will stay at home. I don´t want you to be led into the temptation to work while you are away."

And with these words Joan took the laptop and put it into her bag and left quickly before Auggie could say anything else.

Auggie shook his head in disbelief. Joan had really taken away his computer and he had not had any chance to keep her from doing that.

A day later Auggie sat in the hall of the rehab centre waiting for someone to take him to his room. He hated it to be here. Although his stay was not about his blindness, he felt that he was taken back to the time after his accident, when he went to the rehab centre for the blind. After a while he heard a female voice call him „Mr. Anderson? Will you please follow me." And then he heard the retreating steps. _Great!_ He nobody had realized that he was blind. When the young woman noticed that Auggie had not followed her, she turned, looked back, and then she saw Auggie leaning on his white cane, the suitcase with his belongings next to him. She quickly went back and while she blushed a bit she said „Oh excuse me Sir, I did not realize that you are... I mean that you cannot see"

„Yes in fact I am blind" Auggie replied slightly annoyed and added. „I don´t feel offended when people use the term _blind_ when they refer to my disability". The young woman took Auggie´s suitcase and asked. „How can I help you?" „Just give me your arm and guide me to my room" Auggie said and smiled a bit, because he realized, that the young woman was a bit embarassed and obviously more helpless than he was. It seemed like she had never met a blind person before.

Auggie and his guide had reached his room. „Here we are Mr. Anderson. And by the way, my name is Amy. I am one of the social workers here. So if you need something, please ask."

„Thank you Amy" Auggie said and he went on. „I would like to unpack now and make myself familiar with my room. Would you mind showing me around the building a bit later, so that I can orient myself a bit better?" „Of course" Amy said and then she asked „Would you like me to explain the room to you?" Auggie smiled and replied „Yeah, that would be very kind of you."

„Okay, then take my arm" Amy said and started walking around the room. Here is your bed with the nightstand and next to the nightstand is the steps to the right there is a table and a chair right below the window. Auggie felt for the bed and the nightstand and for the door of the closet and stepped over to find the chair and the table. „On your left is the door to the bathroom." Amy went on „ There is a shower on your left and to the right you will find the toilet, the wash basin and a towel rack. " „You are a quick learner" Auggie grinned „My guess is, you have never been around a blind person before, right?"

„Yeah, that is true" Amy answered and she added „But maybe you can teach me a bit about how to help you. I would be grateful" „And I would be grateful for your showing me around" Auggie smiled.

Twenty minutes later Amy gave him a tour around the building. She showed him the way to the dining room, the massage and physical therapy department, the way to the office of the psychologist and the way to the cafeteria, where he could have some coffee or buy sweets, chips and chocolate. The room that interested Auggie the most, was the gym. He loved physical excercise and he would take any opportunity for a workout at the gym. Next to the gym there was also a pool, where water workouts took place every morning after breakfast.

Auggie had slept well. His first night at the rehab centre had been relaxing. He felt for the button of his talking alarm clock on the nightstnad and heard „It is 6:30 am". Soon, he would have to get up. Breakfast was at 7:30 and he wanted to have a shower first. He hoped that he would find the way to the dining room without problems. Auggie got out of bed and felt his way to the bathroom. He got under the shower, shaved, and when he was about to get dressed, he heard a knock on the door. It was Amy. „Do you want me to take you to the dining room on your first day?" She asked and Auggie smiled in return. „Okay" Amy said „I will be back in fifteen minutes to pick you up".

Amy had kept her promise. Fifteen minutes later she knocked on Auggie´s door. Auggie walked towards her, unfolded his cane and took her elbow. When they arrived at the dining room Amy asked Auggie what he wanted to eat. The patients were supposed to serve themselves from a breakfast buffet. An almost impossible thing for Auggie, given his lack of sight. Therefore Amy told Auggie what was offered at the buffet and Auggie opted for scrambled eggs, rolls, a bit of bacon and some coffee with milk. Amy found a table and set down the tray. Auggie took a seat and started to eat. He had 45 minutes time until his first appointment with the psychologist. He was not sure what was expecting him. „Do you think you know the way to your first appointment?" Amy asked. „Yes, I think so" Auggie replied and continued with his breakfast. „Ok" Amy said and left.

Auggie had finished breakfast. He took his cane and made his way to the door. It was not so easy for him to navigate through the maze of tables and chairs. But he managed to find the door on his own. On the threshold he mused...what had Amy told him? About 50 steps to the right, through the glass door and the 4th door on the left. Auggie set his cane in motion and walked along the corridor. After a while, he reached the glass door, opened it and veered a bit to the left. He trailed his hand along the wall to count the doors. When he reached the 4th door, he knocked. He heard someone call„come in" reached for the door handle and entered. He swept his cane in a small arc in front of him guided by the voice from the other end of the room.

The psychologist behind his desk watched Auggie with curiosity. She was not prepared for a blind client and wondered how the first appointment would turn out. „Mr. Anderson, please take a seat" The woman said. Auggie found the chair on the opposite side of the desk with his cane, felt for the back and sat down. He folded his cane and put it on his lap. „What can I do for you Mr. Anderson?" The psychologist asked „My name is Karen Smith and I am your therapist for as long as you are here"

Auggie felt uncomfortable. He remembered his first encounter with a shrink two years ago. Just like now, Joan had forced him to undergo therapy despite his fierce refusal. And now, everything seemed to repeat itself. He was sitting in the office of a psychologist and it did not make any sense to him to talk about himself and about his feelings. After a moment of silence Auggie said

„I don´t know why I am here and what I am supposed to do here."

The psychologist looked up from her notepad and replied „I have heard that so many times before and I am sure we both will find out what brought you here."


	16. Chapter 16

Starting from Scratch 16

Annie walked past Auggie´s office. She peeked through the glass door, but she realized that Auggie was not at his desk. It was the second day that she missed him and she wondered what had happened to him. A minute later she was on her way up to Joan´s office. „Come on in" She heard Joan Campbell´s voice when she arrived.

Annie walked towards Joan´s desk and asked „Can you tell me what is going on with Auggie? Today is the second day, that he has not been in his office and he does not pick up his cell phone either" „Auggie will be on leave for the next 6 weeks" Joan said.

Annie´s brows shot up in concern and surprise. „What is wrong with him?" she enquired.

Joan got up from her desk and answered „Let me call it he is on a trip to himself"

„ A trip to himself?" Annie repeated, gave Joan a puzzled look and continued „What is that supposed to mean?"

„Auggie is exhausted. He has been through too much recently. He needs a break. I don´t want him to get arrested again because he loses his bearings or his nerves . I have known Auggie for long enough to be worried about him, so I forced him to go to a rehab facility to work on the latest events."

Two days later Auggie sat in the office of his psychologist again. It was his second session. After his frustrating first session, he had let off steam in the gym and he had beaten the heavy bag so violently, that despite the gloves his hands had hurt for quite a while.

„So what can I do for you today?" Mrs. Jenkins the psychologist asked him.

Auggie sat on his chair on the opposite side of her desk and was fumbling with his folded cane on his lap. „I already told you that I don´t know what I am supposed to do here" He said after a moment of silence.

„What about, that your boss is so worried about you, that she sent you here?" Mrs. Jenkins said.

„I do not need a shrink" Auggie said and the expression on his face showed that he was getting annoyed. „So why did you follow your boss´advice to come here?" The psychologist insisted.

„It is not like I have a choice...and if I do not want to risk my job..." Auggie said.

„We will get to the bottom of your problems by using one or the other way." Felicia Jenkins said.

„What do you mean by _one or the other way_?" Auggie asked.

„Well, one way is that you tell me what is bothering you. But obviously you are to stubborn to let me in. The other way is hypnosis. When you are in a state of trance ,you will surely be prepared to let me know what is going on in your life"

„Hypnosis?" Auggie was incredulous. He had heard of this special technique applied by some psychologists, but he had never considered that as an option for himself to work on his problems or on the events of his past. He did not want to admit, that in times of stress or under extreme conditions, his blindness weighed on him more, than he was willing to accept. But what Auggie hated most about hypnosis, was the idea of being helpless. He hated the feeling to lose control of his life. He was a leader, a soldier, someone who had gotten used to giving orders to others.

Auggie did not want to make his fear too obvious and so he said „I guess I am not the type of guy who can easily be hypnotized. I heard that it requires some sort of willingness to get into a state of trance. And to be frank with you I AM NOT WILLING."

„Despite your refusal, I would like to give it a try" Mrs. Jenkins said and then she added „You don´t have to be scared, nothing bad will happen to you"

And then she looked at Auggie and said „Mr. Anderson your eyes are tired...your eye lids are heavy... they get heavier with every second...your eye lids will now close slowly...your entire body relaxes and you will fall asleep...NOW!

Despite Auggie´s refusal it had worked. Within a few seconds he had fallen into a state of trance and Mrs. Jenkins was now able to get through to him.

„_Mr. Anderson where are you now?"_ She asked him

„I am in Tikrit, the explosion has knocked me over and everything around me is dark!"

„_How do you feel now Mr. Anderson?"_

„I am scared I cannot see what is happening around me"

„_Are you blind Mr. Anderson?"_

„No, I am not, I just can´t see, that´s all.

A few seconds later the psychologist asked again

„_Mr. Anderson where are you now?" _

„I am in a hospital"

„_What are you doing there?"_

„I cannot see"

„_Are you blind Mr. Anderson?"_

„No, I am not. I just cannot see, that is all. I am not blind. Things like that happen to other people not to me. I will see again, I am sure.""

And when the psychologist asked for the third time

„_Mr. Anderson where are you now?" _

She realized that Auggie cried

„_What is going on with you Mr. Anderson?"_

„The doctor said I was blind for the rest of my life. But I am not. I am not a blind person. I don´t want to be blind and I will not be blind" And his voice got louder and he screamed „I AM NOT BLIND, NO...NO...NOT ME!"

The psychologist had heard enough and decided to end the session and to wake up her client. She snapped with her fingers and said „Mr. Anderson wake ….up...now!" And within seconds Auggie opened his eyes and with a puzzled look on his face he asked „What happened?"

„You fell into trance" Mrs. Jenkins said and then she continued „I think I have an idea now what is bothering you. Our work has just begun."

Auggie sat in his room. He was frustrated. In military terms_ he had lost the battle _so to speak. His refusal to answer the psychologist´s question and his refusal to try hypnosis had not kept him from falling into trance. He wondered what Mrs. Jenkins had found out about him. He did not want to let other people in on his personal feelings. Auggie took his cane and decided to go to the cafeteria. He needed some distraction and a coffee to stock up on caffeine would be just right. He set the cane in motion, opened the door of his room, turned right and walked straight away to the cafeteria.

The room was crowded.

He could tell that by the noise and the many voices he heard. He found the service counter, ordered a coffee with milk and asked the waitress to lead him to a table. Oh how he hated that feeling of dependence. In Langley he did not think about these things so much. At work his mind was occupied with the preparation of missions, with codes to crack and with many other daily tasks. There was no time to think about his problems and he appreciated that sort of distraction.

Auggie had immersed himself into work since his accident. He worked overtime on a regular basis and the word „distraction" had become a word that had its origin in a foreign language.


	17. Chapter 17

Starting from scratch part 17

The experience with hypnosis had made Auggie a bit insecure. Which details about his life had he given away in a state of trance? How would that influence the next session with the shrink? Auggie needed to find out soon what had happened to him during the hypnosis session.

While some of the other patients of the facility sat in a room for occupation therapy Auggie let off steam at the gym again. What sense did it make to him to make pottery objects or to draw pictures he could not even see. So he preferred physical excercise to keep his mind from spinning and to keep himself in shape so to speak. He had thought of Marissa a couple of times and he had wondered how she was doing. He decided to call her.

Auggie entered his room again. After the workout at the gym he needed a shower. He went into the bathroom and after a refreshing shower he changed into a white T-shirt and a pair of dark-blue jeans. Then he grabbed his phone from the nightstand and dialled Marissa´s number.

„Hey Auggie, what a pleasant surprise" sounded her voice through the phone.

„How are you doing?" Auggie asked.

„Well, school is tough. Still have not got the hang of Braille" she said with a deep sigh.

„That will take some time. I needed about a year to be a proficient Braille reader." Auggie replied and added „Don´t worry you will be okay"

„That might serve as a consolation for me" Marissa said and Auggie could hear the smile in her voice. And then she asked „Where have you been lately? I could not reach you and I rang your doorbell a couple of times but you were not at home."

„Hate to tell you that, but I am in rehab. My boss believes I need to work on certain things"

„Why does she think so?" Marissa was getting curious now

„Well, I have no clue" Auggie said and sighed „There are still 4 weeks to go until I will be back home."

„I would love to see you again soon." Marissa said

„Yeah, I would love to see you, too." Auggie answered. He had missed her a bit.

Two days later Auggie had just decided to nap a bit because the night before had been almost sleepless, when he was startled by a knock on the door.

„Come in!" he called with a sleepy voice and seconds later he realized who the intruder was who kept him from sleeping.

„May I come in Mr. Anderson?" That was the voice of Marissa.

Auggie got up from his bed and offered her his lead. He led her to the chair by the window and sat down on his bed.

„Wow, that is really a surprise." He said and continued „I did not expect you to come and visit so soon. Would you like to go for a walk with me?"

„Yes, why not. My cane skills are getting better every day." Marissa said and smiled. Auggie made his way to the closet, took out his brown leather jacket, put on his shoes and grabbed his neatly folded cane from the nightstand.

„Do you want to take my arm?" He offered. Auggie had become familiar with the building and the surroundings but for Marissa it would be a lot more difficult to navigate her way through the maze of corridors. She was therefore grateful for Auggie´s offer."

„The blind leading the blind again?" She quipped and Auggie grinned „Yeah, that is how we call it"

Shortly after Auggie and Marissa strolled through the park both sweeping their white canes back and forth. After a short while Auggie found a bench and both took a seat. For a moment Marissa and Auggie were quietly enjoying the sunshine on their faces and the chirping of the birds in the trees above them but then Auggie enquired „How do you progress? Have you already adapted a bit to the darkness around you?"

To other people Auggie barely spoke about his feelings as a blind man or about blindness in general. He preferred to forget that he could not see. But with Marissa it was different. She was in the same situation. Just like him, she had lost her sight and had to give her life a new direction. Therefore Auggie was not scared to broach the subject. He remembered how he had felt in the first weeks and months after the accident in Tikrit. He had fallen into a deep depression and had even attempted to put an end to his life.

Marissa turned her head a bit into Auggie´s direction and said „I feel a bit better now, but I still have not gotten used to the idea that I will never see again." I am trying to adapt to being blind, but it is hard to accept that my life will be a long dark tunnel from now on. My Braille skills are getting better, but I am still scared to walk with my cane alone out on the streets. A taxi brought me here and the driver accompanied me to your room."

Auggie had listened to Marissa, and her words had brought back old memories to him. Things, he had already forgotten, or at least tried to forget. „I know how you feel" Auggie said. He reached for her hand and squeezed it a bit. Then he brought Marissa´s hand to his lips and placed a gentle kiss on the back of her hand. When he let go of Marissa´s hand he continued „This is a strange feeling. I mean I cannot see you and you cannot see me. Two blind people together. Since my days in rehab seven years ago I have never met other blind people again. And to be honest I tried to avoid it. I have always been the only one who is „different" But it feels good to have somebody who shares my experience. " Marissa smiled and replied „Yes, it is good to have someone to talk to. I am so glad that we met. And then she felt for her watch and pressed the talk-button. She listened to the voice announcing „It is 3:40 pm" and then she said.

„I need to go home now. It was nice to see you again Auggie"

„Yeah, it was nice for me, too" Auggie replied and both got up from the bench and made their way back to the building.

The next morning at 8:30 right after breakfast Auggie had his next appointment with Mrs. Jenkins. He opened the door of her office, took a seat across from her and waited for her questions.

Mrs. Jenkins came right to the point „I know what is bothering you Mr. Anderson" She said and studied Auggie´s expression.

„Oh, and what did you find out?" Auggie asked in return.

„Well, I am pretty sure that your disability is your problem. You have not accepted that you are blind."

Auggie laughed „This is absolutely ridiculous. I have been blind for more than 7 years now. I have adapted, I have gotten used to live as a blind person. Your statement is nonsense." He protested.

„I am pretty sure that my assumptions are right" Mrs. Jenkins said and she explained „In a state of trance, people talk about things, they would not admit under normal circumstances. While you were under hypnosis, you were only talking about your blindness and about your fears to live as a blind man. My guess is, that you still struggle with your condition."

„AND I AM TELING YOU THAT I DON´T!" Auggie said and his expression showed clearly, that he was getting mad at the doctor. „I live a pretty independent life. I can read and write Braille, I can walk with my cane in familiar places, I have my own apartment and I have a job with a lot of responsibility. Isn´t that proof enough, that I have come to terms with my life as a blind man?"

„Your statements may all be correct" The psychologist said and she added „But still, there is a part of you, that has not accepted your blindness. You need to work on that. Talking helps. You need to admit your feelings, you need to open up to others, in order to move on with your life. And above all, you have to be honest with yourself."And after a few seconds of awkward silence she said „And by the way, what kind of job do you have? You were talking about a lot of responsibility."

Auggie turned his head a bit and answered „I am in charge of the IT Department at the Senate. Me and my staff keep the whole IT apparatus running. That is a pretty demanding job with lots of liabilities."

„Wow" Mrs. Jenkins said. „I would not have guessed that"

„What would have been your idea?" Auggie asked her „Switchboard operator? Massage therapist? Piano tuner? One of these typical jobs for blind people, right?"

„Your ironic undertone shows me, that I have touched a soft spot. Your blindness IS a problem for you" Mrs. Jenkins stated before she got up and accompanied Auggie to the door. He had reluctantly taken her arm before he left. He would have preferred to walk to the door alone to show his independence. Mrs. Jenkins had noticed Auggie´s reaction. That had been a secret test. Now she knew that Auggie had a problem to accept help.


	18. Chapter 18

Starting from scratch part 18

The days at the rehab facility passed and Auggie reluctantly complied with what was on his schedule. The regular sessions with the therapist were something he would have loved to avoid but he couldn´t .

One Friday afternoon he sat again in the office of Mrs. Jenkins and the familiar procedure repeated itself. Auggie fell into a state of trance and Mrs. Jenkins started to ask him questions.

„Mr. Anderson where are you?"

„_I am in Barcelona"_

„What are you doing?"

„_I am walking down the stairs, I am attacked, I lose my suitcase...oh God! I am losing my balance...I don´t want to fall down the stairs...I cannot see...my cane...I have lost my cane...!_

„Mr. Anderson how do you feel?"

„_I feel lost, I feel helpless for being blind"_

Mrs. Jenkins noticed that Auggie started to sweat and tremble. She gave him a short break before she continued with her questions.

„Mr. Anderson where are you now?"

„_I am at home"_

„What are you doing?"

„_I am with my girlfriend, she wants to leave me. She walks away. she walks to the door. Dammit! I cannot run after her because I am blind. I cannot run...I am stumbling...she´s gone..._.!"

Mrs. Jenkins noticed again how confused and how vulnerable Auggie became when he talked. She was on the right way to get through to him.

„Last question Mr. Anderson. Where are you now?"

„_I am with Helen, my ex-wife. We are in her apartment"_

„How do you feel?"

„_I feel insecure. I have never been there. She has to help me find my way around. I don´t like to be led. She is insecure, too. She doesn´t know how to act around me because I am blind now. I feel uncomfortable."_

Mrs. Jenkins had heard enough. She snapped with her fingers and said „Mr. Anderson...wake up...now!" and Auggie opened his eyes again and with a puzzled look he said.

„Did it happen again?"

„Yes, Mr. Anderson, it did and it was very interesting, indeed very revealing. We are on the right path to get to your problem"

Auggie shook his head and again he said „I don´t have any problems" and then he unfolded his

cane, tapped it on the floor to lock the components properly and made his way to the door.

Annie missed Auggie. She missed him as a colleague and as friend. She missed the chats they had over a cup of coffee, she missed his smile and she even missed his blind jokes when he tried to hide his vulnerability. How was he doing? She asked herself. She would love to call him, but Joan had told her not to get in touch with him. He needed some distance. Distance from Langley, distance from his job and distance from everyone who reminded him of his job.

Annie had a hard time resisting the temptation to call him just to hear his voice again. She sat in her favourite Italian retaurant with Ryan when he suddenly said „Annie where are you?" You seem to be far away and lost in thought, at least I take it that you are not with me right now."

Annie shook her head and took a sip of her Bardolino wine before she cut off another piece of her Pizza Prosciutto Funghi. „I am just a bit tired" She said and Ryan noticed that she was not telling the truth. But he was smart enough not to dwell on the subject. He knew her and he knew that if she wanted to talk, she would tell him what was bothering her.

Why do I always think of Auggie when I am with Ryan? I love Ryan, he loves me. What does it mean that Auggie is always on my mind?

Annie was confused. She and Auggie had split up more than a year ago when she had gone dark.

She could not turn back the clock when she returned to Langley. But why?

Deep inside, Annie was questioning herself about her motives. She still loved Auggie in a certain way but was that real love or maybe a bit of compassion? His blindness had never been an issue when they were together, but there were moments when Annie asked herself if she could deal with his disability if they stayed together for good. He was pretty independent considering the special circumstances but there would still be situations when he would need her help.

Would she be able to deal with all that on the long run? He could not drive, he could not read maps and he could be pretty helpless in a new environment. On the other hand, Auggie had always been her loyal ally. He had always been there for her when she needed him and whenever he was incapable to help her in person, he had always found a friend to take over his part. For example when he had sent Eyal, to get her out of that Russian prison after she had hunted down Lena Smith.

Auggie sat in his room with a Braille book on his knees. He did not read a lot when he worked, but on vacation, or now on rehab, he enjoyed to slide his fingers across a good book and to immerse himself into a different world.

The story he read was a love story by Nicholas Sparks. Sparks´ books were always romantic but with a touch of tragedy in the background. From time to time, Auggie enjoyed reading books of that genre.

After an hour or so he rose from his seat by the window and went to the door. He grabbed his cane from the bed and made his way to the cafeteria. He needed a coffee and some distraction.

When he reached the cafeteria he ordered a coffee with milk an two chocolate muffins. The waitress who knew him already, showed him to a table and he took a seat.

After while he heard a voice next to him say „Excuse me, may I take a seat?" Auggie looked up, turned his head a bit towards the voice and replied „Yes of course"

„There is no other free table" The young lady said when she sat down. She put her handbag on the table and set down her coffee mug. Immediately she realized that Auggie did not meet her gaze.

She looked at him and said „May I ask you something?"

Auggie had an idea what the question would be and he said „If you want to know if I am blind...Yes I am"

„Oh, you are some sort of mind reader?" The young lady said.

„No, definitely not" Auggie replied and then he continued „But I know, whenever people start a sentence with the words_ may I ask you something... _it usually has something to do with my handicap.

„My grandfather was blind, too" The young lady said. He was blinded in Vietnam. He could not forget what this war had done to him. He never got over his loss of sight. You however, seem to be quite relaxed. If I may say that."

„You should tell that my shrink" Auggie said. „She believes I have not gotten over all that yet" And then he wondered how easily he could talk to a complete stranger about his life. And without thinking any further, he told the woman about the IED explosion that took his sight and about his struggle to live a life as a blind man. Of course he did not tell her, that he was in Special Ops or that he was CIA, but being a soldier was nothing special. A lot of Americans had served their country and had come back from Afghanistan or Iraq with visible or invisible injuries and wounds. Often, Auggie thought that the invisible wounds like PTSD were the more serious ones.

The young lady had listened carefully and with admiration in her voice she said.

„Wow, that is an interesting story. You really went through a lot but you do not seem bitter. Many others in your position would have given up already."

„I was bitter, too right after my accident" Auggie said and the memories of him laying in a hospital bed in total darkness came back to him. But he wiped them away and answered instead

„Thanks for the flowers" and then he took another sip of his coffee whilst he felt for the rest of his muffin with the other hand. Then he wiped his fingers with a napkin and turned again towards the young lady. „It was nice to meet you. I did not know how easy it can be to talk to a total stranger about my life" he stated.

The young lady smiled at him and said „I enjoyed talking to you, too. I did not know much about blindness, since my grandfather never talked about his feelings. You have opened my eyes so to speak."

„You´re welcome" Auggie said, rose from his seat, unfolded his cane, tapped it twice on the floor to lock the components properly and made his way to the door. The young lady watched him leave and admired how he found his way through the maze of tables and chairs with his cane.

_I can still help people, even if I am blind. There are also other ways to give a sense to my life even if it does not concern my job._ Auggie thought whilst walking back to his room and thinking that made him smile. Maybe this stay at the rehab facility made sense after all. For quite a long time had not thought so clearly about himself and the possibilities he had despite his blindness.


	19. Chapter 19

Starting from scratch part 19

Auggie was in his room again. He folded his cane and before he put it on his nightstand, he carefully explored it with his hands. The last time he had done that, was when he got his first cane years ago. He slowly let his hand slide across the black rubber handle, slid down the metal tube until he touched the little ball on the tip of his cane. _The cane really has become a friend of mine_. He thought.

The conversation with the young lady at the cafeteria had made him thoughtful. He had been using this cane for the last seven years every day. At the beginning, he had hated this metal tube, because it drew attention to his disability. He did not want to be blind, he did not want to be seen as something different than a „normal person". But there was no „normal" for him after his accident. Everything had changed. The way he perceived the world around him, the attitude of the people he met and often the way they treated him and even his job had changed. He was not a field operative anymore.

The time at the rehab centre had not failed to show an impact on Auggie. He was not distracted by missions and work issues. He had had a lot of time to think about himself, about his life and about what it meant for him to be blind. He had tried to avoid these thoughts for a long time. And if he was honest with himself, he still hated to admit that he was blind. He still hated to use the word „blind" but there was no other way to describe his condition. He could use other words to avoid the term „blind" but they all meant the same thing. Vision loss, sightlessness, visually impaired, visually disabled...all these words were nothing than synomyms for the word he tried to avoid as often as possible.

Monday morning at 9:00 Auggie entered Mrs. Jenkins office. He found the chair with his cane, folded it, felt for the seat and sat down.

He fumbled a bit with his cane because he realized that the psychologist was still occupied with something. After a few seconds, she looked up from her dossier and asked him.

„Mr. Anderson what do you associate with the word HELP?"

Auggie hesitated. He was not sure how to answer this question. He did not want to give away too much of himself because HELP was a word that he hated, too. He hated it to ask for help and that had turned out to be a problem for him, because as a blind person he often had to rely on other people´s help to get around.

Auggie cleared his throat „Well...to me _help_ means...assistance...to assist other people when they cannot proceed on their own..."

„All right" Mrs. Jenkins said and then she continued „I would have liked to hear what the word _help_ means to YOU PERSONALLY"

„I already told you what it means to me" Auggie replied

„Okay, then let me say it in a different way. What does HELP mean to you and for your life as a blind man?"

Ooopss...There she was the question, Auggie did not want to answer. But it appeared that he had no choice. Again, he cleared his throat and then he answered „ To me, as a blind man, it means that I often have to ask for help"

„Okay,...and how do you feel when you have to ask for help?"

Mrs. Jenkins said and studied Auggie´s expression carefully before she heard him reply.

„You told me to be honest...so here we go...**I hate it** to ask for help. **I hate it** to depend on other people and I** hate it to be blind**"

„Wow...! I did not expect such a clear statement" the psychologist said and she added „Congratulations Mr. Anderson, that you have finally admitted your problem, you have given a name to the feelings you have buried deep inside you for such a long time. I already knew what was bothering you. And with a soft voice and a bit more sympathy in her tone she continued „When you were under hypnosis, I got so many hints and they all led me to the same conclusion YOU HAVE NOT ACCEPTED THAT YOU ARE BLIND."

Auggie was shocked. He was at a complete loss for words but after a few seconds, he swallowed the lump that had formed in his throat again and asked

„What exactly did I say?"

After he had heard himself asking this question he was afraid of the answer he might get.

Mrs. Jenkins looked at him and explained

„During our hypnosis sessions you obviously went through a lot of events again that have influenced your life. All of them had to do with your blindness. Your reactions under hypnosis showed me, how deep your fear of living the rest of your life blind, is. You mentioned the word _helpless_ many times and always in connection with situations you could not handle alone or not as easily as a sighted person.

Auggie had listened to Mrs. Jenkins. Finally, he had an idea what he had given away under hypnosis. But how could he deal with the fact that a complete stranger had got so much and so deep insight into his life and into his personal and even private feelings?

Auggie tried to meet the psychologist´s gaze and said „Congratulations Mrs. Jenkins. You have achieved what others have tried before. You have successfully managed to bring my deepest secrets to the surface" And with these words he unfolded his cane again and walked to the door. Before he felt for the door handle he turned a bit and said „And now, I need to digest all of that" And with these words he walked out and decided to go for a stroll through the park. He needed to collect his thoughts.

Whilst walking along the garden path Auggie tried to remember everything that Mrs. Jenkins had said to him. She had asked him to be honest with himself. Honesty was not always easy. But he felt that he had reached a point, where this strategy might help. And if he questioned himself about his feelings now, he had to admit that he felt some sort of relief. He was relieved, that he had finally found the courage to give a name to his fears.

It had cost him so much energy to maintain the image of the handsome, funny and smart tech guy who never allowed himself to show vulnerability. It had cost a lot of effort, to hide from others, how difficult every day tasks could be for him since he had lost his sight.

He did not want pity and he did not want to be treated differently. For this reason, he barely spoke to others about his private life and he seldom invited people for a visit. He did not want them to see, how he had to feel for the cutlery and the napkins when he laid the table, he did not want them to see, how he had to feel and grope for the things on the floor, when he had dropped something and he did not want them to see, the tears of frustration that sometimes appeared, when he was drained and tired from counting steps, walking with a cane and memorizing the position of people and objects in order to get around in a world, designed for sighted people.

At work in Langley, he was able to function pretty well within his limitations but aside from that, things could be complicated.

Maybe his shrink was right and he should allow himself to let go of the picture of the flawless man.

A few hours later, Auggie was in his bed and for the first time in years, he felt a peace of mind that he had not experienced before. Blind or not, allowing himself to show vulnerability did not mean that he was less valuable, less capable. He had understood that and he had come to the conclusion, that opening up to others, was a way to get rid of the mental stress that his evasion techniques had caused him over the years.

Two days later, Auggie´s stay was over. He sat on the bed, waiting for the taxi driver to pick him up.

Five minutes later, a knock on the door anounced, that the taxi had arrived. Auggie walked to the door and opened.

„Do you need any help?" The taxi driver asked

And Auggie answered „Yes, if you could take the suitcase, please?" And then he unfolded his cane and followed the taxi driver to the car. When they reached the taxi, the driver asked again

„Do you want me to help you?"

And Auggie smiled and said „Yes please, if you could show me where the door is"

The taxi driver took Auggie´s hand and put it onto the door handle. Auggie opened the door and took a seat. Leaning back into the seat, he thought _Life can be a lot easier when you allow others to help._


	20. Chapter 20

Starting from scratch part 20

Auggie was back home. He trailed his suitcase with his left hand whilst he used the cane with his right. He got out of the elevator and walked to his apartment. He was happy to be back and he was glad to get back to work the next day. He slid the door open and trailed his suitcase to the couch. He lifted it up in order to unpack later.

It was a strange feeling to be back home again after so many weeks at the rehab facility. But Auggie enjoyed the peace and quiet of his rooms. The centre hat always been a busy place with the hustle and bustle of patients, visitors, therapists and doctors. Even at night it had never been totally quiet.

Auggie needed to get some groceries first. His fridge was empty and he was a bit hungry. He dialled the number of the grocery-delivery service and ordered before he started to unpack.

The next morning Auggie woke up to the sound of his alarm clock „beep beep...it is 6:30...beep beep beep...it is 6:30" the voice announced and Auggie felt for the button to stop the noise and then he remembered that he was at home again and that he needed to get ready for work.

He padded to the bathroom and took a shower, then he made his way to the closet and chose dark-blue trousers, a light-blue short, a dark-blue vest and a tie.

A last sip of coffee and Auggie closed the door behind him. The car service was already waiting for him outside. The driver saw Auggie approach and opened the door for him. „Good Morning Mr. Anderson, good to see you again" he said and Auggie found the open door with his cane before he sat down in the back of the car.

Twenty minutes later he had reached Langley. He swept his cane back and forth until he found the door. Attached his badge to the vest and walked along the hall towards his office. The usual sounds of a bustling place greeted him. Talks on the phone, typing and tapping on keyboards and chatting colleagues...he was „back home again".

Auggie walked through the glass door, found the desk with his cane and stated that nothing had changed in his absence. His Braille keyboard, his phone and his document reader were still in the same place and so Auggie folded his cane, put it in the top drawer and started to boot the computer.

Seconds later he heard a knock on the door. He turned a bit and heard the voice of Joan say „Good Morning Auggie, how are you doing?"

„Hey Joan" Auggie showed her a broad smile and got up from his seat. He trailed his hand along the side of the desk and seconds later he stood next to Joan.

„I am fine" he said and Joan studied him carefully before she stated „You look a lot better, I would say almost relaxed"

„Yeah, I am indeed relaxed" Auggie said and added. With hindsight, I would say you were right. I needed to have a break from Langley and from everything else. I have discovered a few things that I would not have noticed otherwise."

Joan gave him a puzzled look and her brows shot up in surprise. „What would that be?" She said with a curious undertone.

„I am blind" Auggie said

Now Joan gasped. She had not expected this statement. She looked confused and was at a complete loss for an answer. Auggie noticed her surprise and hesitation and tried to explain

„It is not a secret that I am blind... I know... but for a long, long time I had kept on pretending that nothing had changed. I had tried to forget that I am blind and I did not want to admit how much I hated the fact to be blind and how ashamed I felt for being visually disabled."

For a moment Joan was glad, that Auggie could not see her face when he talked to her. His explanation had not only surprised her, it had even shocked her. She had never heard Auggie talk so frankly about himself. A huge lump formed in her throat and her eyes were filled with tears. She remembered the day, when she had learned that one of her best operatives had been in a bomb attack and that he was blinded as a consequence of the blast. Joan tried to collect her thoughts, swallowed and cleared her throat before she said

„ Auggie..., I want you to know that I will _always_ be there for you if you need me and my support."

Auggie had sensed the tension and had guessed that Joan was about to cry. He raised his hands, felt for Joan´s shoulders, put his hands on them and said „Joan..., I can assure you... I am fine, I am fine now...and I would like to thank you for insisting on me going to that rehab centre. I have learned a lot about myself and I think I have found a better way now to deal with my life as a blind man"

And with a „_Thank you_" he placed a little kiss on Joan´s right cheek before he felt his way back to his seat by trailing his left hand along the edge of his glass desk.

Joan wiped her eyes with the sleeve of her white blouse and said „Let´s get back to work, I am glad you are back now" And then she turned on her heels and left, before she allowed another wave of emotion to wash over her. She did not want the rest of the staff to notice her emotional state since she was known as the „ice-queen" of the DPD.

Auggie put on his headphones and started working. He was glad to be back at his desk and to be back in Langley. And then his mind wandered back to Annie.

Annie...he had not thought of her for a while. His mind had been so occupied with his own emotions and with his mental struggle to come to terms with his life that he had almost forgotten her. But now, back at his desk, he missed the scent of Jo Malone Grapefruit and the click of her heels when she entered his office. Auggie worked quietly for a while. Lots of mails had piled up in his inbox and he was so immersed that he almost did not notice the familiar scent that filled his office.

„Jo Malone Grapefruit" He smiled and turned his desk chair a bit.

Annie walked a bit closer and sat on the edge of the glass desk. „It is good to have you back" she smiled and Auggie tried to meet her gaze. Sometimes he succeeded in making eye contact with other people and that led to confusion. People who did not know him well, sometimes even doubted that he could not see. But when they noticed how carefully he counted his steps when he walked, they were convinced that he was really blind.

„I missed you" Annie said and then she continued „Are you up for a beer tonight at Allan´s?"

„A beer after work?" Auggie asked

„Yes"

„Yeah, great idea" he smiled into Annie´s direction. „Just you and me like in the good old times?"

„Yeah, just you and me like in the good old times" Annie repeated. Patted Auggie´s shoulder and rose from the desk. She walked towards the glass door and before she opened it she turned again and said 8:00 o´clock?

„Good, 8:00 o´clock" Auggie replied before he put his headphones back on and continued working. The time passed and before he could realize it, it was 5:00 p.m. And Auggie left. He took his cane out of the top desk drawer unfolded it and tapped his way to the door. He had done that so many times before, but today he felt differently about it. He felt more at ease when using his cane in Langley. He usually had tended to use the laser cane a bit more. It was more convenient and above all more inconspicuous. But after all he was blind and needed a walking aid for orientation. He was not ashamed anymore to use the cane in Langley.

A quarter to eight Auggie walked to the pub swinging his cane back and forth. He counted his steps and finally turned, when he reached the door. He found the door with the tip of his cane, reached for the handle and walked in. Annie spotted him in the doorway, got up from her seat and bumped her hand with the back of Auggie´s . „Hey, handsome" she grinned and he took her lead and let her guide him to the table where two glasses of beer were already waiting for them. Annie put Auggie´s hand on the back of the chair and he took a seat whilst folding his cane neatly.

„I really missed you a lot" Annie said when she had taken her seat across from Auggie. If he had been sighted, he would have seen the sparkle in her eyes and the look she gave him. At that very moment Ryan was far away and all Annie wanted was to be with Auggie.

She reached across the table and took Auggie´s hand. She squeezed it gently and said „It is so good to have you back." Auggie had felt the emotion rising and then he did, what his intuition told him. He moved his chair a bit closer to Annie´s side, slowly searched for her shoulder, slid his hand up her neck and gently pulled her head a bit closer to his face before he placed a long and passionate kiss on her mouth. Annie reciprocated and pulled him a bit closer. The world stood still and for a moment they were just two people in love, kissing each other.


	21. Chapter 21

Starting from scratch part 21

Auggie and Annie had not spent a long time at the tavern. After the first kiss they had quickly emptied their beer glasses and had left. The night in Auggie´s bed was fabulous. One passionate kiss had followed the other and when Auggie´s sensitive fingertips had explored slowly and softly every inch of Annie´s body she had shivered and reciprocated with gentle kisses on his bare chest and his mouth.

Now it was 6:30 in the morning and both were tired and exhausted from a long night but they were also happy. Annie watched Auggie who had curled up beside her, his eyes as usual staring blankly into space. With her right hand Annie touched Auggie´s face and gave him a passionate kiss. „Will you ever get enough of me Walker?" Auggie grinned. „I don´t think so" Annie replied and then she studied again Auggie and the expression of his hazelnut-brown eyes that could not see.

After a few seconds she asked „How do YOU see the world Auggie? And how do you see me? In Amsterdam when we were on that boat, you mentioned that one day you would describe me. You haven´t done that up til now"

Auggie shifted a bit to change his position. He tried to make eye contact with Annie but he did not exactly meet her gaze. Then he cleared his throat before he explained „ It is not so easy to explain how I _see _the world aroundme. Of course I have an idea, what the world looks like, since I could see for a very long time. However, my ideas about the places I go to, or about the people I meet, are only vague. I can determine whether the space around me is small or huge when I listen to the sound or the echos around me, I can tell where the bar or the counter is in a restaurant, when I listen to the clatter of the glasses, bottles and dishes... I can smell it when I walk past a bakery or a snack bar, but of course I cannot determine colour and shape of objects and I guess that my ideas of the people around me are often wrong as well.

I know that you have blond hair, that reaches down to your shoulders, I know that your hair is a bit curly and I know that you are slim and athletic". And then with a wistful undertone he continued „But of course, I will never know whether my very own picture of you matches your _real_ appearance". Annie had listened to him and for a moment she felt sorry for Auggie. It was not exactly pity, because she knew what a capable person her friend was despite his handicap. It was more the feeling of regret, that he would never be able to find out whether his ideas of the world around him were right.

„What is going on?" Auggie asked. He had sensed that Annie was obviously lost in thought because she showed no reaction to his words and she did not move either. „I don´t know" Annie said and then she continued „I know, that this might sound a bit strange to you and I don´t want you to get me wrong...but I just thought how nice it would be if one day you could verify if your assumptions are right"

„Yeah, that would be very nice indeed" Auggie said and continued „But you and I know, that this will not happen. I will be blind for the rest of my life." He paused a bit before he added „ When I dream of people that I knew before I was blinded, I have an image, a memory, what these people look like. But it is totally different with those, that I met when I was already blind. There is no idea whatsoever what they look like. I just rely on the voice I hear on the tactile experience when somebody shakes my hand...I have stopped to ask myself what the people around me look like. It doesn´t matter to me anymore. I take what I need to know about them, from the input that my other senses will give me. The scent of a perfume, the sound of a voice, the rustling fabric of a dress...and many other details, that might escape other people´s notice help me to form a picture in my mind, but this picture is not visual at all."

„I have been blind for more than seven years now and in the meantime I have forgotten many things. I have for example forgotten what certain colours look like because this information is useless for me now".

Annie had listened to Auggie and she was deeply moved. He never talked about himself and he seldom talked about his feelings as a blind man. She lifted her right hand a bit and gently touched Auggie´s face. She knew that Auggie kept his feeling close to the vest. With a soft voice she asked

„How hard is it for you to talk about that?"

„It was a lot harder before" Auggie said. He sat up in bed and said „Lots of things have happened while I was away and if you want I will tell you now"

Annie sat up in bed, too and snuggled down in Auggie´s arm. „I am all ears" she said and looked up to him" His unseeing gaze did not meet her eyes, but she loved the expression of Auggie´ s hazelnut-brown eyes.

„I had a lot of time to think about myself and about my life and I have realized that I have made many mistakes. I know that this might sound very strange, but up until a few weeks ago, I could not admit that I am blind. I hated to think of myself as a blind man and I hated to use the word „_blind_" when talking about myself. Despite being blind for a long time, I still felt ashamed to admit to others or even to myself that I am _disabled _now. I did not want to see myself like that. My inner struggle, or more precisely my fight, against a picture of myself that does not exist anymore, has cost me a lot of energy. My inability to accept help, has caused me a lot of problems in the past. But now, I have learned that accepting help can make my life a lot easier and does not diminish me as a person."

Annie had listened carefully and said „I would not have guessed that so much has been going on inside you. You have always been the rock I could rely on. I never would have assumed that you had so many doubts about yourself. You are a great person Auggie, and that is why I love you so much. And if you let me in, I would love to know and learn a bit more about your life as a blind man. Don´t try to hide, just be the man you are, you do not have to play a role, when you are with me. You are perfect for me just the way you are. The fact that you cannot see, has never been an issue for me. You have so many qualities, that even other sighted people do not have. You have no reason whatsoever to believe that you are less valuable because you are blind." And with these words Annie took Auggie´s face into her hands, pulled him a bit closer and kissed him passionately.

„Do you really want to know what my life is like?" Auggie asked now and Annie nodded. Then she remembered that Auggie could not see, and she replied „Yes, I want to know more about you"

„Okay" Auggie said and got up. He made his way to the closet and searched for a scarf then he walked back to the bed, sat down and said „Annie, take this and cover your eyes."

Annie took the scarf out of Auggie´s hand, wrapped it around her forehead until she could not see anymore. Auggie felt for Annie, touched slowly her face to check if she had done what he wanted her to do and then he said:

„Follow me into the kitchen now" and Annie got up and reached for Auggie´s arm. She felt insecure because she was unable to see. Auggie place her hand on his elbow and led her to the kitchen. He guided her to a chair and started to make breakfast.

Annie listened to the sound of the coffeemaker, the clattering of the cups and plates that Auggie got out of the cupboard and she tried to imagine and remember what the kitchen, she had seen so often looked like. At the same time she thought that Auggie would never really know what his place looked like. She asked herself which picture of his own place he might have.

Auggie laid the table, got some cheese, butter and jam from the fridge, put some slices of bread into the toaster and finally poured two cups of coffee whilst putting his index finger a bit below the rim to prevent himself from spilling the hot coffee.

Annie slowly felt for her cup and searched for the butter and the jam jar on the table. When she had finally spread the butter and jam on her toast and had taken her first bite, she said

„You make it all look so easy Auggie. I did not know how hard it is to spread some butter on a piece of toast without seeing".

Auggie smiled „Well, at the beginning things can be tough, but with time and patience it gets easier. Most things require more time and a different technique when you can´t see, but you get used to it."

Both continued their breakfast for a while in silence and then Annie asked „May I try your cane? I would like to know what it feels like to walk with a cane"

„Of course you can" Auggie answered and then he made his way to the credenza, took the folding cane and handed it over to Annie.

Annie had seen many times how Auggie unfolded his cane but now she felt a bit clumsy and fumbled with the cord, that kept the folding units together, before she finally managed to open the cane properly.

When Auggie heard that the cane units snapped into place, he stood behind Annie, took her wrist and showed her how to hold the cane. Seconds later, Annie started to walk around the room. She swept the cane in an arc and came across Auggie´s couch, his couch table, his credenza and finally she reached the stairs that led up to the bedroom.

„How do I find the stairs with a cane?" She asked and Auggie answered

„Hold the cane in a vertical position right before your chest and you will know when the next step comes"

Annie tried to follow Auggie´s instructions and she finally managed to climb the four stairs without falling or stumbling.

„Funny" she said „I have watched you so many times but I could not really remember how you do all these things like walking stairs up and down, pouring coffee and all that stuff."

„That is normal" Auggie said „You do not need all these things, so why should you bother to remember the way I get around"

With his right hand a bit extended, he walked towards Annie, felt for the cane that Annie had put on the bed, folded it, put it on the nighstand and asked „Would you like to try how fascinating it can be to make love without seeing?"

Annie sighed and replied „I am all yours" and then she kissed him passionately on his mouth and he reciprocated her kiss whilst pulling her closer to him.


	22. Chapter 22

Starting from scratch 22

Annie woke up slowly. She wondered why it was still dark. But then, she remembered that she was still wearing the blindfold or more precisely Auggie´s scarf was still wrapped around her forehead. She reached over to Auggie, who was not awake yet. She gently touched his face and when she felt him move, she placed a kiss on his forehead, then on his mouth. "Good morning Walker" Auggie murmured, his voice still a bit sleepy. He felt for Annie´s shoulders, wrapped his arm around her and pulled her a bit closer.

"Good morning handsome man" Annie smiled and then she added "So that is what it feels like to wake up without seeing. I wanted to know what it is like and I have to say it feels strange, even a bit scary to me"

"You have to get used to it when you´re blind" Auggie said. "It took me months to get used to waking up in the dark knowing that this is my fate. To realize, that I will never see the sunrise or the sunset again. It was hard to accept that the darkness around me would not go away anymore."

Annie swallowed. She slowly took off the scarf and put it gently into Auggie´s palm. "Thank you, for letting me in" she said and kissed him softly on his lips. Auggie took the scarf, brought it a bit closer to his face and stated "Mmmhhhh…Joe Malone Grapefruit…..it smells like you" And then, with a roguish grin he added "Maybe I will never wash that scarf again".

Auggie enjoyed being with Annie. They had spent another wonderful night in his apartment. Auggie had been to Annie´s apartment, too but he preferred to be in his own home. After all he was blind and it was a lot easier for him to get around. New places required a lot of adaptation. He had to memorize every step he made when he was not at home. These things till bothered him from time to time even after being blind for such a long time already.

"What time is it anyway? " Annie asked. Auggie felt for his talking alarm clock on the nightstand and pressed the button. "It is 7:05 am" the voice announced. We´d better hurry to get to work. Annie said "Or Joan will get us fired for being late"

"I cannot believe that I forgot to set the alarm" Auggie said and got up. He made his way to the bathroom and got under the shower. "There won´t be time for coffee" he called from the bathroom whilst Annie was getting dressed and made the bed.

Ten minutes later, Auggie appeared in the frame of the bathroom door and Annie looked at him wistfully. "I cannot stop staring, because you are in an excellent shape" She smiled and Auggie felt his way to where she stood. "I´d better get dressed" he smirked and went over to the closet to make his choice for the day. He opted for a grey pair of trousers, a white shirt and a light-grey vest with a red tie. "You look spectacular!" Annie remarked when Auggie had finished dressing himself.

"I have to believe you, I cannot ask my mirror anymore" Auggie said and grabbed his cane and his messenger bag from the credenza before he took Annie´s arm and left.

The day in Langley started with a bunch of e-mails that Auggie had to answer. When he opened his e-mail account, he came also across a more private mail from Oliver Harrison. Just like Auggie, Oliver was a veteran. He had served in Iraq, too. He and Auggie had met at the rehab facility where both were trying to adapt to a life without vision. Whilst Auggie had lost his eyesight in an IED explosion, Oliver had lost his vision due to an attack with acid. Even the area around his eyes was full of tiny scars. For that reason Oliver used to wear dark sun glasses. He did not want to expose himself to the pitiful looks of others, even if he could not see it.

Auggie opened the e-mail and read:

**Hey Auggie**

**It´s been a long time since we have talked. I would like to see you again. I will be in DC next week.**

**How about a beer and a chat about the old times?**

**Call me if you are up for a conversation with an old army buddy. **

**Here is my cell number : 200 455 789 1**

**Regards**

**Oliver **

Auggie was surprised. Just like Oliver had mentioned, it had been a long time since they had met. Oliver was Auggie´s only blind friend, aside from Marissa, of course. He liked the idea to see him again and therefore he dialled Oliver´s number.

A few seconds later Oliver took the call.

"Hey buddy, good to hear your voice again!" Oliver said.

"Yeah, good to hear you, too" Auggie answered and then he continued

"I would also like to see you again, what about 8 pm on Thursday evening at Allan´s Tavern?"

"Great, Thursday at 8" Oliver said and ended the call.

The next two days passed quickly and Auggie was looking forward to the evening with his friend. On Thursday evening a bit before 8 he made his way to the pub. He counted his steps and when he found the door with the tip of his cane, he heard a familiar voice say "to the right Sally"

"Hey, is that you Oliver, have you brought a girl with you?" Auggie called and Oliver replied "Yeah, it´s me Auggie and I brought a girl with four legs and brown hair. May I introduce, this is Sally my seeing eye dog"

"Wow, you got a dog" Auggie said and both men entered the pub. When they got in, Oliver said "table Sally, find table" and a few seconds later Sally led Oliver to a free table in the corner of the pub. Auggie followed slowly and was suprised how effortless they had found a table in the crowded pub. He hated it to walk through the maze of tables and chairs when he was alone and searching for a place to sit.

Oliver and Auggie took a seat and a moment later a waitress came to take their orders. Oliver ordered two beers and some snacks. "My treat today" he said and turned a bit into Auggie´s direction. Soon the two guys were immersed into a conversation about their time in the military and about the months they had spent together at the rehab centre for the blind.

"How is the job search going? " Auggie asked.

"Well, I have found a job as a social worker. I work with people with disabilities and I help them with all the red tape when it comes to apply for unemployment benefit, pension issues and many other things. I like my job and the advantage is, that people with a disability feel more comfortable when they can talk to someone who has similar problems. "

"And where do you work? Still in that IT job for the Senate?"

"Yes, still the same job" Auggie replied and then he changed the subject.

"Tell me a bit more about your dog, how did you get Sally and what is she able to do for you?"

"Sally has become my best friend. We have met at the guide dog training centre, half a year ago. Since then, we have been a team. Sally helps me to get across the street, she can find doors, seats in restaurants trains etc. and she walks with me to my office every morning. Another advantage of having a dog is, that you feel a bit more protected. A blind person with a dog is not such an easy victim for criminals"

"I was suprised how easily we found a table here. I don´t like crowded places where I have to search for a free seat." Auggie said with awe in his voice.

"Yeah, indeed Sally makes a lot of things way easier for me and I enjoy the new freedom" Oliver admitted and patted the head of Sally who had curled up under the table and was now napping.

Time passed and around midnight Auggie and Oliver left the pub. Auggie had to get up early the next day and he did not want to be late.

The following morning, Auggie was back at his desk. He had lots of things on his schedule but from time to time he found himself thinking back to the conversation with Oliver. Around noon, he made his way to the cafeteria to get some coffee and a snack. He took his folding cane and tapped his way along the corridors. When he reached the service counter at the cafeteria, he ordered a cappuccino and a sandwich with ham and cheese. He asked the waitress to guide him to a table and all of a sudden he remembered how easily he had gotten around with Oliver and his guide dog the day before. Something has to change he thought by himself and took a bite of his sandwich before he sipped on his Cappuccino.


	23. Chapter 23

Starting from scratch part 23

Auggie had enjoyed the evening with his old friend Oliver. And he had thought a lot about how easily Oliver got around with his seeing eye dog. Auggie loved dogs and he often thought of Jerry, the dog of his grandparents in Illinois. Jerry was a Golden Retriever and Auggie loved it to play with him in the garden and to take the dog for a walk through the forest close-by. Since Jerry had died when Auggie was 11 years old and Auggie had never had another dog. His parents would not allow it, and later on, his job as a field agent had made it impossible to get a dog.

Now, the idea to own a dog, took more and more room in his mind. Auggie could not get rid of the idea to have a dog. Monday afternoon after work, he booted his laptop at home and started his research. After a while, he found an address and a phone number that he could call. He took his stylus and wrote down the number in Braille. He would make the call later. Auggie got up from his desk and went to the coffeemaker to prepare some coffee. He filled some coffee into the filter, poured two cups of water into the coffeemaker and pressed the start button.

Soon the scent of fresh coffee filled the room and Auggie poured himself a cup before he picked up his phone again.

Auggie dialled the number and listened to the tone on the other end of the line „Guide Dog Association, Sandy speaking, what can I do for you?"

„My name is Anderson I would like to obtain information about guide dogs. Could you send me some brochures?"

„Sure, would you like them in Braille?"

„That would be great" Auggie replied and gave his name and his address. Now, all he could do was wait. But he decided not to tell anybody about his enquiries. At least, as long as he had not made a clear decision.

Three days later, Auggie opened his mail box and found a huge envelope in it. He touched it and felt Braille bumps. It was from the Guide Dog Association. He quickly made his way to his loft and opened the envelope. Minutes later his hands flew across the page and took in the information. The decision to get a dog was also a question of money. But money was not the problem. Auggie received a monthly amount from the Veterans Association as a compensation for his injury and his sight loss. So he had saved up enough to get a dog. He was considering to take part in the guide dog programme and therefore he had to fill out some forms. But that was not possible without help. He needed to get there and have the office clerk help him to write everything down. Even after so many years, it was still frustrating for him to ask for help when he had some paperwork on his desk.

The following Monday Auggie had another appointment at the Guide Dog Association. He had all the necessary paperwork in his messenger bag, plus all the information about his financial background and resources.

Auggie swept his cane back and forth, found the steps that led to the door and opened it. Seconds later, he heard a friendly voice say „Can I help you Sir"?

„Yes, my name is Anderson and I have an appointment at 3:15."

„Yes, Mr. Grayson is already waiting for you. May I show you the way to his office?" The young lady said and then she added „Would you like to take my arm?" And then she touched the back of Auggie´s hand and he took her lead.

It was always relieving for him, when he met somebody, who was familiar with his situation and offered him the help he needed.

Two minutes later Auggie sat in the office of James Grayson. James Grayson was in charge of the institution and he was blind, too. He was blind from birth and had, unlike Auggie, never experienced what it was like to see. His secretary Jenna had taken a seat next to Auggie and wrote down all the information that Auggie gave her.

After 20 minutes, all necessary forms were complete and Jenna asked Auggie to sign. She took his right hand and showed him the line for the signature. In a couple of months Auggie would be attending a course at the Center. He would have to learn how to use the guide dog and how to follow the dog´s cues. It was an exciting idea for him, to know that soon he would not have to find his way in total darkness all alone anymore. Auggie was definitely looking forward to the arrival of his new companion.

Tuesday morning in Langley was busy. Auggie´s desk was filled with files in Braille that he had to read and his e-mail account was full of new messages. He had just placed his fingers on the first sheet, to start sifting through his documents, when he realized a familiar scent in his office.

„Good morning beautiful lady" he grinned and turned his desk chair into the direction of Annie, who stood now right beside him.

„Good morning handsome man" She smiled back and kissed him on his mouth. Auggie enjoyed the scent of her perfume and the soft touch of her lips on his and pulled her a bit closer. He could hardly get enough of his beautiful girl friend.

„What have you been up to lately?" Annie asked after a long passionate kiss.

Auggie considered the possibility to tell Annie about his plans, but then he had second thoughts and replied.

„Nothing special, needed some time to relax and I thought we might spend a weekend together. What do you think?"

Annie was delighted. She definitely needed some time off and a weekend with Auggie was just right. Therefore she asked „Have you made any special plans already?"

Auggie gave her his broad Auggie smile and answered „Yeah, I have some plans but it´s gonna be a surprise for you. Trust me, you will surely like it"

„August Anderson you make me curious" Annie said and tried to sound stern but the tone of her voice gave it away that she was smiling at him.

„You will have to be patient" Auggie said and got up from his seat and felt for Annie´s shoulder before he pulled her into another embrace.

„But for now, you should get back to your job. Joan is watching her employees like a hawk. At least so I am told. "

„You are right" Annie said before she placed another kiss on his mouth and left the room.

Auggie felt for his desk chair, before he sat down again and continued reading his files by sliding his hands across the Braille sheets. He had learned to read fast and after half an hour he had already read most of the pages in front of him.

The weekend Auggie had planned for Annie and himself would be a success, Auggie was sure it would. He had booked a room in a romantic hotel for them. The special thing about the hotel was, that it was an old mansion. It almost looked like a castle. The place was not far away from DC but far enough to give them the feeling of a getaway, a short holiday only for the two of them.

Annie stopped the car in front of the huge building and gasped. „Wow Auggie, you have picked a marvellous place!"

Auggie smiled. He was glad, that Annie liked his surprise. „I was told that the building and the garden around are impressive"

„It really is" Annie was still incredulous at so much beauty. The house was a 2-storey building and surrounded by a lush garden. The trees and bushes were cut ,as she had seen it in the gardens of grand palaces like Versailles or Schönbrunn in Vienna. The lawns were neatly cut and the flowers in huge flower pots lined the gravelpath that lead to the entrance of the building.

Annie started the motor again an turned to the right where she had spotted a parking lot. She found a free space for the Corvette and took the luggage out of the trunk whilst Auggie got out and unfolded his cane. He trailed his free hand along the side of the car and finally reached the back part of the car, too. Annie handed him his trolley suitcase and said.

„Wouldn´t it be better, if you kept your cane folded and take my arm?

Auggie nodded „Yes, that might be the better idea" and then he folded his cane and put it in the messenger bag, that he had slung across his chest. Annie offered him her elbow and Auggie trailed his suitcase with the free hand behind, whilst Annie took her bag in her left hand.

When they reached the door of the building, they were greeted by a doorman in a blue uniform with golden buttons and a serious expression on his face.

„Welcome Madame, Welcome Sir" he said and opened the door for them. Then he took Annie´s bag and Auggie´s suitcase and led them to the reception desk.

As they approached the reception desk, Auggie said

„Hello, my name is Anderson. I have booked a double room for two days for me and my fiancée"

„Of course, Sir. The young man in a blue hotel uniform smiled, and started checking the booking list in his computer.

„You have room 34 on the second floor Sir. And with these words he handed Auggie the key card. He had immediately noticed that Auggie was blind and put the keycard directly into Auggie´s palm.

Then he added „If you like we can give you a tour around the house"

„That would be nice" Auggie replied and turned towards Annie, who stood behind him. She brushed her hand against his and he took her lead, when they followed the receptionist. The young man led them through the spacious hall with marble floors and marble columns right into the huge dining hall. Furniture in Rokoko style and an elegant parquet floor were the main features of the room. The sunlight fell through windows, that reached from the floor to the ceiling and flooded the room with its brightness.

Auggie and Annie followed their guide across the room and were led onto a huge terrace. Sun loungers and umbrellas lined the balcony balustrade and in the right corner of the balcony a bar with a number of bar stools was set up.

Annie described the environment to Auggie as exactly as she could and he tried to remember the details she gave him.

Before they finally reached their room ,the hotel employee showed them to the spa area of the hotel. It comprised a huge pool, a sauna, a whirl pool, a Turkish bath and finally a cosmetic parlour and massage facilities.

I hope you will enjoy the stay at our hotel, the friendly young man said when he had finally shown them to their room. Annie smiled and took the key card out of Auggie´s hand before she opened the door. Even their room was impressive and Annie stood in awe when she entered with Auggie.

„This is fantastic!" She exclaimed, looking at the huge 4-poster bed with silk curtains on its sides and white silk bed linen. The room also had a huge window and a balcony, spacious enough, to host an entire soccer team.

„Auggie you have no idea how gorgeous this is" She said again but then she stopped and went quiet. She felt a bit guilty for her comment. There were times, when she was sorry, that her friend could not take in all the beauty around him. Auggie noticed the sudden change in her behaviour and said.

„I surely have no idea, how stunning this place is, but don´t worry. I am used to getting the pretty views second hand only." He said that with a smile and then he felt for Annie´s hand and squeezed it reassuringly.


	24. Chapter 24

Starting from scratch part 24

Auggie sat at his desk. He had just finished typing a letter and felt a bit tired. He rubbed his eyes and decided to go to the cafeteria to get a snack, It was already past lunchtime, he noticed when he opened the lid of his tactile wrist watch.

His thoughts went back to the weekend he had spent with Annie three months ago. Since then, he had not had another break yet. The hotel he had taken her to had been gorgeous. At least that was what Annie had told him and he had enjoyed being with her.

On their first day, he had explored the hotel room with his cane to orient himself. He had felt for the silky curtains of the elegant 4-poster bed, had traced his hands along the wooden carving of the bed and had enjoyed walking barefoot on the fluffy carpet around the bed. He had discovered the place with all his senses. But one of the most memorable things was the walk through the park. The smell of the roses, the splashing sound of the huge water fountain and the quiet atmosphere were a pure pleasure for him and had made him forget about stress and the hectic bustling life in Langley.

In a few days, a new life would begin for him. He would attend a course at the Guide Dog Center in Willington, a place not far from DC. Auggie was excited. He had no idea what was expecting him there.

But right now he needed a break. He got up from his seat, took his folding cane from the drawer, let the units of the cane snap into place, tapped the cane twice on the floor and made his way out of the office. The cafeteria was not so crowded anymore because lunchtime was already over and he appreciated it, since it made it easier for him to navigate. He opted for a bowl of tomato soup and a sandwich. The young waitress brought everything to his table and Auggie started eating. He had not realized how hungry he was, until he caught the scent of the soup and took the first bite of his cheese sandwich. He had been eating for a while, when he heard someone approach his table and finally took in a familiar scent.

„Hey Annie" He smiled and Annie took a seat next to him after she had placed a kiss on his cheek. Auggie was still chewing on a piece of his sandwich when Annie asked him.

„Is it true that you will go on a vacation? Joan told me about it. How come, that you did not tell me?"

Now Auggie felt a bit uncomfortable. He had not told Annie yet about his decision to get a dog. He swallowed the last crumbs of bread, felt for the napkin to the right of his plate, wiped his fingers and his mouth and said.

„Well,... I wanted to tell you tomorrow. It is not exactly a vacation. It is more...let´s say...some sort of seminar."

Annie lifted her brows in surprise „ A seminar, what is the purpose of it.?Do you need to update your Nerd skills?" Annie joked.

„Not exactly. I will actually not be alone. I will have a companion by my side. He has four legs and will keep me company in the future"

Now Annie was confused. She looked at Auggie with a quizzical expression on her face and asked.

„What are you talking about?"

„Well, I have decided to get a seeing eye dog" Auggie said and smiled into Annie´s direction.

„Wow that is fantastic" Annie exclaimed and added „I think this is a perfect idea, it will surely make things easier for you when you go out." And then she explained „Not that I take you for clumsy or incompetent, but I think you will enjoy the company of a four-legged friend and maybe you will reach your destinations more quickly with some help."

Auggie searched for Annie´s hand, took it, squeezed it a bit and said.

„I hate to admit that, but I am as nervous as a six-year old on his first day at primary school. It has been a while, that I went to school or took seminars. Soon, I will not have to find my way all alone anymore in complete darkness. I already wonder what that will feel like."

„It will surely feel good" Annie said and squeezed Auggie´s hand in return.

„I am sure that you and your dog will be a good team"

Five days later, Auggie got out of his taxi. He paid the driver and asked him to guide him to the building. When they reached the entrance, he held his cane in a vertical position counting the steps and a few seconds later he was greeted by one of the employees of the centre.

„Good morning Sir, you must be Mr. Anderson. The group is now complete. We have four ladies and three men attending the course." A nice female voice said and offered Auggie her lead, brushing her hand against his.

„Yes, I am August Anderson" Auggie replied and took the young lady´s arm accepting her lead.

She guided him to his room, explaining all the details and Auggie counted his steps carefully trying to memorize everything. Arriving in his room, he slowly explored it. There was a bed to his right and on the opposite side he found a closet and a desk right next to the closet. Auggie felt his way around the room and when he reached the end of the bed, he felt for the wall and found the door that led to the bathroom. The bathrooom was small and had no windows..But windows were not important to him anyway. There was a shower to his left, a wash basin and a toilet on the right. Auggie unpacked the few toiletries he had brought , put them on the shelf above the wash basin and stowed the clothes from his traveller bag in the closet. The whole centre was set up for the special needs of blind people. Every room had a room number in Braille letters and the signs in the building were also written in Braille. Auggie appreciated this thoughtfulness that made it easier to get around.

When he was done, he grabbed his cane and left the room. Slowly, he made his way to the elevator that would take him to the ground floor again. The first day in a new environment was always the hardest. He would probably never get used to that feeling.

Auggie reached the hall and the young lady who had welcomed him, now approached him and introduced herself to him.

„My name is Olivia. If you have a question just let me know. Lunch will be ready in about half an hour, but if you would like to explore a bit before the meal..."

„Thanks" Auggie smiled into her general direction and slowly found his way to the door. He walked down the four stairs and turned a bit to the right. Olivia had told him, that there was a huge garden with a pond and a few benches to sit on. He walked slowly, sweeping his cane back and forth in a steady rhythm. The long white cane had been his companion for more than seven years and would soon be replaced by a living creature, a dog, that he had to take care of. This thought was a bit strange and he hoped that the decision to have a seeing eye dog was the right one for him.

Auggie walked slowly along the garden path and listened to the sound of the quacking ducks on the pond. After a while, his cane touched a bench. Auggie felt for the seat and sat down. He closed his eyes and listened to the sounds around him. He heard the birds chirping in the trees above him, he listened to the rustling leaves in the wind and from a bit further away, he heard the barking of dogs. He was definitely looking forward to his new friend on four legs. He wondereed, whether his dog was one of those, he could hear barking in the distance.

After a while, Auggie felt for this watch. It was lunchtime and he had to walk back. When he reached the dining room, Olivia led him to a table. He took her elbow and had her guide him to a table where two other participants of the course had already taken a seat. He introduced himself and the two others gave him their names. Laura and Steven were also from DC. She worked as a massage therapist and Steven was a music teacher at a school for the blind. Pure cliché he thought. The typical jobs for a blind person. He represented however an exception. There were not many blind CIA agents. Maybe he was the only one.

The meal was delicious and Auggie enjoyed the company of his two new mates. They shared the same sort of humour and Auggie appreciated that. Laura had gone blind after a car accident five years ago and Steven was blind from birth. A congenital eye condition that ran in his family. When the three had finished their dessert, Auggie heard his cell phone ring. He tapped the screen twice to take the call, and heard the voice of Annie on the other side of the line.

"Hey handsome blind man, how is it going?"

"It is going fine. I just explored a bit my new home for the next two weeks and had lunch"

"I am gonna miss you" Annie said and Auggie could hear the wistful undertone in her voice.

"I am gonna miss you as well" He replied. Before he ended the call.

Auggie had a restful night. He had slept like a baby in its cradle and woke up to the sound of his alarm clock at 7:00 am. He felt for the button to stop the annoying noise and felt his way to the bathroom.

He quickly took a shower, shaved and went over to the closet to get some fresh underwear. Today was the first day of his new life. A life that would probably bring a bit more of personal freedom and independence. Auggie had already reached a high degree of independence as a blind person but things could even get a bit better with a dog.

Auggie made his way to the dining room to have breakfast. Just like the day before, he took a seat at the table with Laura and Steven and the three chatted whilst enjoying their coffee, scrambled eggs, toast with jam and cheese.

After breakfast, Alan, one of the instructors of the centre welcomed them warmly and informed them about the schedule for the next two weeks. First of all they would get a course in dog care. Not everyone in the group had already had a dog before and so Alan taught them the basic things about dog care. The time passed and soon it was noon and lunchtime. Auggie and the other group members enjoyed their meal and afterwards they would meet their future companion for the first time.

Auggie was really nervous . What if the dog did not like him? What if he did not like the dog? A thousands thoughts danced around in his mind. Immersed into his own thoughts, Auggie sat on a chair in the huge living room. The other group members had also taken their seats and were waiting for what was to come.

After a few minutes, Auggie heard the barking sound of dogs and the tapping of feet on the parquet floor. Olivia, Alan and a few other employees entered, each of them with a dog in tow.

"This is your new friend" Alan said and touched Auggie´s hand to pass him the leash.

His name is Mingus and he is a beautiful Golden Retriever.

"Mingus?" Auggie repeated incredulously.

"Yeah, Mingus. Have you ever heard the name of that musician?"

"I actually did." Auggie answered. If the name of the dog was an omen, then it was a good one. A dog named after his favourite Jazz musician would be perfect for him.

And within a second Auggie felt a warm and humid tongue lick his fingers and the dark brown eyes of Mingus watched him with curiosity.

"Hey Mingus" Auggie said and patted the dog´s head. "I hope we will be a good team" he added and smiled.


End file.
